Mar
31
You know what.. I went back to school to be more educated and learn more things and be better at what I do, and I am still working full time at the same time. I still cannot tolerate the idea of working with other people on a project! People in my group are either fucken drunks, too lazy, their personal drama is way more important or just pathetically stupid who don’t give a crap.
I hate working with groups!! I have a job and no time to deal with idiots!! Weekends are my ultimate free time! I am so pissed right now and I am gonna give my group a very bad review! They will NOT get the same grade I will be getting!!! 
Aghhhhhhhhhh!!
Mar
30
The biggest discussion that I probably argue with people is religion. What is a religion? It’s to be part of a group of people that follow the same belief system. Ok good, we defined that part easily. So what is a Muslim? What is a Christian? What is a Jew? The three most common religions in the world that believe in one God and that’s it. So what’s the problem with that? Far too many. The cultural differences is the key! So let’s get back and explain the culture first before the religion. Obviously a Muslim from Iran is culturally different from a Muslim in Malaysia. Yes they pray 5 times a day. Yes they fast Ramadan and do all the good deeds of the 5 pillars.. But do they really interpret the religion the same way? No. The cultural differences are more over powering. Life maybe as a Muslim in Malaysia is more liberal than Iran. Or vice versa. It all depends on the cultural surroundings.
How about an Arab Muslim and an Arab Christian? Same culture exactly. Different religious views. However when you talk to a Palestinian Christian you can never tell what religion he/she follows. You can’t see a difference in sociological behavior at all. You can never know the difference unless you asked them what is their religious views! Same goes for other religions. How can you really tell unless you know where they are from and how they are raised?
So why am I bringing up this topic? Simple. I believe that as a person raised in North America for over half my life that I have become culturally religious. What does that really mean? Well, first off, no one can ever tell what religion I follow. I don’t have an obvious appearance that segregates me to any religious groups. Ok, so that’s confusing, but Canada is a very multi-cultural country? So it makes sense. I am easily mistaken as a Christian.. why? Well, cause I know a lot about Christianity because I was raised around Christians and I used to live in the South in USA where majority of people are very conservative Baptist. But I don’t follow Christianity. No, I know many things about it, but I was raised as a Muslim. This is confusing now. Not really, I follow my religion because I was raised that way and I respect it, but I am very well educated and aware of other religions and especially Christianity because I live amongst them. Great, but what’s the point? Well, the point is that because I live in a Christian dominated culture, that I am automatically stereotyped as one because I have no other religious trademarks. No Hijab (scarf), and no conservative actions. Nothing! Well, what does that have to do with cultural differences really? Well, when you live in this culture you somehow blend in and loose any differences. But there must be some differences that makes it obvious. Not really, I just follow the standard, no eating pork, and no drinking alcohol. So that makes me a Muslim? I mean what does eating / drinking have to do with religious stereotypes? I mean first thing when I say, “I don’t eat pork or drink alcohol” is that I automatically stereotyped as a Muslim. I am like yes and? What is vegetarianisms? Do you expect me to believe that when a person tells you they don’t want to have any meat in their food is because they are vegans? I doubt it, I know for a fact that they just don’t trust any type of meat and could be Jewish. I mean sometimes I just ask for strictly vegetarian food because I just don’t know what kind of meat really is in the food. So right there I just eliminated the religion/food difference. So religion might not be 100% the cause of it, and I was raised to be abstinent from these things and it just became a habit. Once you are raised and growing up all your life doing something in particular than you just end up hating it and not getting close to it. That’s it. So the cultures and religious views have been mixed. Sort of yes and no. I don’t want to seem nonreligious, but I follow Islam because I was raised that way. So I was culturally raised that way. How? Simple, I am an Arab and Arabs are known to be conservative and morally ethical people. So is Islamic views! Yes, so the religion and culture is obviously mixed. I know many people don’t agree but that’s how I feel about this situation.
I obviously understand and tolerate Christianity and Judaism because I live amongst them and I accept it. I just believe in all three religions and I believe that living in North America, especially in Canada that I have become somewhat mixed culturally and religiously. Whatever the person chooses to follow is their choice. I chose to keep following the main religious beliefs of Islam which is a mix of the Arabic culture. I also chose to blend in the multi-cultured lifestyle of Canada that is Christian dominated in order to not segregate my self from the norm.
So in conclusion, I love all religions and I love all cultures and I just want to mix them all and live a nice morally and ethically liberated life.
So really, I just like all religions, and I like to be culturally religious in Canada and just be part of everything. 
Mar
29
I have a little sister. She is 14.5 years younger than me. She is 11 years old now. All day long she kept looking at me and saying: “I am prettier than you. You are just full of makeup! I have nice light brown hair and hazel eyes! I am not as dark as you..” blah blah.. I gave her an evil look and said.. “SHUT UP! Don’t compare your self to me! You are a kid!” Agghh.. stupid kids are self conscious from that age! It’s insane! They compare them selves to adults.
Well I wouldn’t call my self an adult since I argue and fight with a kid that young on a daily basis.. hmm.. I wonder what I can do to get her out of that ugly/pretty phase. When I was her age I was playing with dolls and watching cartoons! She watches sitcoms and goes on the internet! The world has changed so much! My generation was awesome. We were innocent and simple. Took life one step at a time. Didn’t have so many complicated thoughts and the urge to grow up so fast. We wanted to be kids forever! I never ever looked at other girls or thought I was pretty (which I am not, I am average).. until I was maybe 16 or 17. 18 for sure I was so into looks!
Any who… I wish I was still a kid. At least my spelling and grammar would be a lot better and I would get praised for making kick ass websites!
Mar
28
This is the rule: The Rule: “Each player of this game starts off with ten weird things or habits or little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks!�
- I never make my bed. I find it sinful to do so in the morning when I am half asleep and rushing to get out of the house to get to work.
- I sit on the computer from 8:00 am till roughly 11:00 pm at night. I do get up a lot.. but total sitting around 13 hours hours a day. Lately my back is hurting me. I can’t help it, I got too much work!
- I am addicted to coffee in the morning. If I don’t drink coffee I get a huge headache and I feel the world around me is spinning. But I only drink one cup a day!
- I have bad addiction of cleaning my right ear. I keep thinking there is something in it! Agghh.
- I have a scar on my right eye from falling from a hill when I Was 6. It is my trademark if I ever get lost as my parents tell me. lol
- When I am angry or nervous I tend to chew on my lips and remove the skin.. so my lips always look dry.
- I have a bad habit when I am super pissed that I just get up and leave and go sit on a bench somewhere outside and just look at a tree or grass or just nature in general.
- I obsessed with checking all my emails all the time. I think I am just afraid I am too late to do something.
- I always day dream constantly with things I like to happen just to give me some hope and a happy feeling at that moment.
- I like to always have TV on as long as I am awake as background noise. It helps me get more work done!
Anyways.. I tag everyone who reads my blog to post this tag on theirs. Just leave me a comment so I can check it out on your blog. If you don’t have a blog, than just post your answers as a comment! :P
Mar
28
Hey guys.. I know some of you who post don’t have a gravatar. You wonder what it is? It’s a globar avatar that many blogs use. So for blogs that support avatar, your global avatar is displayed next to the comment whenever you comment on someone’s blog. So all you have to do is sign up with http://www.gravatar.com .. post your little picture that you like on there.. and then when you post on anyone’s blog that supports it.. your custom avatar is displayed.. 
cool eh? Try it out you guys. I don’t think you would like that ugly blue gravatar symbol next to your name all the time..
Mar
27
“I miss you”. Such a funny phrase that I don’t quite hear from people that often. I always wondered if people ever miss me. Will anyone ever miss me? I just think it is funny when someone says that to me. I feel butterflies inside my stomach. Such a cute feeling. People actually miss talking to me or seeing me. I am still amazed. Sometimes I have that feeling because I miss someone who has permanently left me. That’s what I just keep thinking about. Will that person ever miss me, but for everyone else that I may not see for a week or so who tells me that make me feel a little special. Hehe.. I feel like a kid who just got some candy.
So anyone miss me?
If not.. how about this.. I miss you!! Whoever you are. I will miss you!
Right now I am suffering from obscure hot weather in my city. It went up to 25 degrees celcius today and yesterday! IN MARCH! Temperatures during these days are maximum 10! Not even. Amazing.. last week it was snowing. This week it is burning. Global warming in effect. So who ever back home thought that Canada will melt soon.. yep.. we are melting.. from the HEAT! Thank God tomorrow the temperature is going to be a maximum of 8 degrees! This extreme weather change is not good health wise! Makes me moody.. :S
Mar
26
I spent my evening chatting with my friend. So this is a true story between two Arabic girls. She told me the story of how her friend was completely jealous of her the other day by saying the stupidest comments ever. So this girl kept telling my friend this: “why you wearing those black Marciano jeans. I thought you had no money to pay for such expensive jeans. Plus why you wearing them during the day. If you wear such jeans it is only for going out to parties or clubs. You are so Arabic. Your style is so Arabic being all dressed up with all that makeup. Stop being like an Arab with that style. Plus those pants are made for black girls with big bootys, is that what you are trying to do? It doesn’t suit you. Also take off all that makeup. My boyfriend is going to come and you look so Arabic with the makeup and clothes. You need to change your style.”
My friend was in complete shock. I told her to stop talking to this girl. I met the girl on Friday my self. She drove with her to my city to meet the boyfriend she claims as hers that she met the week before. Eff.. So my friend is so pissed. I told her I had a bad vibe the moment I met her. I couldn’t wait till she got out of the car cause it was either me or her for another 10 minutes! I don’t know why my friend is still friends with such a girl. Some girls are pathetically jealous and big time users. My friend tells me how she borrows money from her and never gives it back to go to restaurants and to buy expensive clothing. I donno. Some people are friggen weird. I just told my friend to stop this craziness and either tell her off or leave her. This has been a continuous problem that I got tired of hearing about.
One characteristic of girls I cannot stand is jealousy! I find it to be this horrible trait that I fear with all my heart and I am completely scared of!
Mar
26
Full advertisement right now! My friend D is back to blogging! Yaah.. She is my favourite blogger! She left Canada to Kuwait and living a crazy life in the desert! So she made a new blog and she will be an active blogger! http://d-typingoutloud.blogspot.com/. D if you are reading this now.. cool eh?� I can be an advertisement genius too!
Mar
25
A couple of days ago my friend came over again from TO… and we went out to sushi, and she asked me if “he” tried to contact me at all the past few weeks. I told her no. So bluntly. I told her he blocked me off MSN after 5 years and I really don’t care. However, do I care? I kept thinking about this. Do I care anymore about the past? Not really. I am just really mellow about it. I don’t really care anymore. I think I got to that point of life should move on or I will seriously go insane. I think I did go through many phases the past few months. I went through a denial phase. The phase where I kept rejecting the idea that after all these years that he would leave me for no reason. Well the reason is I wanted to live a nice normal life based on good ethics and morals. He didn’t.
Since I am a very stubborn person I really didn’t accept him for how he acted and wanted to mold him to what I wanted. He also did the same thing to me. He wanted me to be a behaved Arabic girl that just listened to him and never ever argued back. You know. Like a maid. Obviously didn’t work out. Plus I am a Capricorn and he is an Aquarius. Really bad match. A match for friendship and that’s it. Even that we couldn’t do! So I try to move on with my life by trying to remember only the negatives of a relationship. My friends tell me that I am lucky I didn’t marry him because that would have been a lot worse. A really bad life. Which is true. I am glad for that. However, my problem is that I have been very anti-future. I quit caring about the future. I hate planning things. I hate even planning things to do for tomorrow. I tell people that I don’t plan. Just tell me when the same day and that’s it. No need to plan things. Planning things gives me major depressive thoughts because I used to plan so much and where did it get me?
So lately I have just been keeping my self so busy that I don’t even think of the past or future. I have become a machine that works day by day and that’s it. It helps me a lot. However, planning, thinking of a future, or imaging a positive outcome someday is not in my head.
Moreover, after the denial, I went through the phase of depression. That’s what I have been suffering from the past few months. I can’t say I am depressed at this moment, but it seriously affected my mood. I have become such an unmotivated person that I don’t feel like doing anything. My motivation level is ground low. I need something to boost my energy. A lot of people around me somewhat make me happy or somewhat give me some hope of a nice future and a good life could be ahead for me, but I am so cynical.
However today I was at the mall with my mom and sister, and my mom was looking at this gorgeous bed. She told me you need to change the furniture in your room. I looked at her and said why. I don’t want to live with you forever. She smiled and that gave her hope that one day I will get married and get the hell out of the house! I was surprised I even said that to her or even thought about it. That was a futuristic thought. First one I had in months! I was always so pessimistic and cynical about such things. So I brought her some joy for the day, and I started thinking out loud and blurted things unconsciously! Major improvement indeed.
Mar
24
I will start by discussing the events of yesterday. Yesterday I had an eventful day. I will start with work. I am making this encyclopedia site that seems to cause controversy with the design. The companies communication wants to contract out to a graphics company and the one leading the project wants me to do it because I am an easy access and I tend to work quickly. So torn in the middle all I hear is yapping from this person wants this.. this person wants that. Aah who cares. I can make web templates easily. I am not that lazy! I have some graphical talent and I can do whatever is needed. So I spent the whole day listening to people and making template demos. Aah.. so that was the end of that!
I hate being just a programmer and have to just listen to all this crap. I want to just say that’s it! Make up your F@#!@$ mind now and end it there! This what happens when too many people are involved to make stupid decisions.
After that I just couldn’t wait to leave. So my friend drove all the way from Toronto. She was an hour late. Not only that.. she brought her weird friend that she kept telling me she is so pretty.. blah blah.. and how she is jealous of her. I saw the girl and I was not really impressed. I actually wanted to see beyond that overly dyed hair and all that makeup! But guess not. So we went to eat sushi.. yumm. I miss sushi. I didn’t pig out much. I wasn’t in the mood to eat. I just wanted to have bits and pieces.
So I went home right after that and she left to some birthday party. At home I just couldn’t wait to just sleep! At the same time I wanted to relax and watch TV. I miss TV. Like actually watching.. not just having it as background sound. It’s great watching TV shows and movies at night.
That was all yesterday.. this morning I woke up fresh. First time in over a week I wake up fully satisfied of a long night’s sleep. Did I dream? I don’t remember. If I don’t than that’s good! I don’t like to dream. I always have weird dreams that freak me out or sometimes I wake up and go on with my day thinking that something did happen. And that thing wasn’t a dream. Hmm. I really don’t like dreaming. Only one time or two times in my life I think I woke up in the middle of the night not being able to breath and my chest was burning. I think I was not breathing at some point during the night. Like people who suffer from sleep apnea. But other times I do wake up from nightmares in shock. :S I know freaky. That’s why I don’t like dreaming. And when I am really tired I have really bad dreams cause even if I am tired I sleep thinking too much. Cause the only time I sleep late if I am up late thinking too much. Doing homework. Or thinking about something that just keeps me up late. Aaghh. In reality I don’t like to sleep cause of dreams.
Me no like dreams. 
So now I am actually feeling sleepy cause I woke up early. I always wake up early.. but I slept a lot yesterday so I woke up early cause of that. Well I should sleep because I have a long day tomorrow cause I did nothing today! So Sunday will not be such a relaxing day!
My name is Mona and I am an internet savvy and technology obsessed girl. I am originally Palestinian and I live in the province of Ontario in Canada. That's some info about me, and you can learn more [
love the new design of the site…when I think this site with the content... 
ps - Be the change you... 
