Lazy week and anger management problems.

So I have not gone to any classes this week. Not that I have many but I didn’t go to any of the lectures. Every time I got up to want to go.. my brain tells me to sit back down and just sit at work and just work. Not that I had too much work or anything this week. I just didn’t feel like doing anything. Learning anything new. Nothing. Just wanted a vacation from everything. I do feel somewhat guilty, at the same time I don’t care. I am just seriously loosing my motivation. I think I am just going down hill as the days go by.

I told my friend the other day that I want to change. Do something different. She is like what. Let’s do it together. She has similar problems as me.. and she lives in a drama world. I try to get her to write a blog but she would rather search brand name shopping sites and shop till she has no money. So she has money problems with her depression that she keeps shopping non stop to make her happier. And I have a need to just scream at people and I am daily loosing patience with people. It is just horrible!

I swear one day I am so gonna blow up and I will feel good after but everyone else will hate me. I think I just need to be put in solitude for some time and not have to deal with people. Not have to hear stories. Not have to interact with others. If I can do that for 3 months I may feel better. But I cannot afford to leave my work.

I think my problem is that I am still in this God aweful city. I think the memories and the aweful 5 or 6 years seriously damaged me. I am barely functionining as we speak. I don’t know how I still manage to work. It’s a miracle I swear. I think it is because I actually like what I do that I still manage to get it done. It still amazes me. It really does.

I want to MOVE away! Alone! WHERE WHERE! Awwwwwwww..

Blah Blah, Ranting as usual!, Whatever!