Now it hit me.. I thought maybe this may take a while to hit me.. but it did. I finally feel the complete utter boredom of life. I just don’t know sometimes why I am still alive. I have such a boring repetitive life. I can’t stand it anymore. I am seriously debating moving away. I am tired of my city and the people here. I think a while ago I promised my self that once I hit the 5 year mark of working that I will look for another job. I have been debating it and I am seriously considering it now. I just need to go away. Experience new things. I am hoping to just move away by the upcoming year. I can’t continue living such a boring life. A friend of mine got a job promotion recently.. and she is climbing up the ladder.. and what about me? Than other people are getting married and moving on with their lives and starting a family and I am just sitting here suffering of boredom and lifeless pursuits.
I just can’t stand this anymore. I need to give my resume to my friend since she is the ultimate manager type hirer and get my act together. I am tired of waking up in the morning taking the stupid bus and sitting in the same stupid chair for 5 years. Why am I bitching about work now? I don’t have a problem with work.. I just got bored of life. People around me are changing.. moving on with their lives.. doing fun and interesting things.. and I am just work work work.. I work every day.. I am asked to do so much and I feel others are doing nothing or putting little effort in what they do! They just work for the money and not care about anything..ÂÂ? I don’t get a permanent position from work.. no benefits nothing.. no real job security in any way.. I have been lying to my parents since I started working full time that I am a permanent great employee.. yet I know I am nothing and I am treated like I am just a programmer. (that’s what I really am! nothing more.. 
) Even my brother the other day asked me if I will have move up and become something different since I have been working for so long.. what am I suppose to say? I need to do something more exciting.. I want to see new things.. experience new things in life.
My problem is that I am too easy going.. not too demanding.. just taking life one step at a time with no real path.. that’s always been my problem.. but I don’t know how to take charge.. I used to. Now I just don’t. I don’t know how anymore. I don’t know what I am capable of doing. I don’t know what I really want anymore. I used to want so much. Now I just don’t know what I want.
Aah this is a reminder to my self if I read this article again tomorrow.. I need to seriously get a hearing test done again.. I think I am getting half way deaf in my right ear. It’s been bugging me and I got tired of asking people to repeat them selves. Maybe that’s another one of my problems.. My slow deafness! Arrghhh.. That’s another thing that scares me.. that I will become deaf in one ear..
Yes it sucks to be me. I know. This rebellious thing is just an act. I am not rebellious. Just a lifeless hating person.
Did you like my writing? If you did then consider subscribing to my RSS news feed or subscribe via email. Want to know what I am doing right now? Then follow me on Twitter.
My name is Mona and I am an internet savvy and technology obsessed girl. I am originally Palestinian and I live in the province of Ontario in Canada. That's some info about me, and you can learn more [
love the new design of the site…when I think this site with the content... 
ps - Be the change you... 
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 1:13 am
it’s just a phase
.. and you are still a rebellious 
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 2:23 am
Don’t get hard on yourself! just like what Dima has said, it’s just a phase and you will eventually move one. More or less everyone feels this thing from time to time, and that’s the reason why you should gather yourself up and go looking for a change.
Keep it up.
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 4:23 am
California is the cure!
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 6:05 am
globalorama has better than
you is what you need big kiss of me you return to me sad.
I prohibits (no…Mona…no)to you to say that have life to you is stupid request you why it has so many people here they are interests share you is somebody of good believe me but I understand that you want change in your life.
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 9:21 am
I’m having enough fun in my job and it makes me an unentusiastic lazy ass anywhere else.
as i’m just working 15 hours a week .. yeah life sucks the rest of the time !!!
:animal2:
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 7:05 pm
I second what globorama said: California *is* the cure! :P
Ah, you’ll get over this phase, and you will always be rebellious!
Monday, May 14th 2007 at 8:36 pm
I want to go to Hollywood and see the stars! I would never stalk them or talk to them.. Just want to see them and maybe take a pic and wave!! I want to see Bruce Willis!
Thursday, May 17th 2007 at 2:47 am
I have a simple suggestion:
Start Your Own Business !
Waste not another minute, you seem to have good links that will support you on your new endavour, go for it !
Friday, May 18th 2007 at 10:06 am
Go to Japan and open a Palestinean Restaurant!
There is none in Tokyo..
Lebanese restaurants(there are only three) are getting popular there.
Thursday, June 21st 2007 at 8:05 pm
I know what you are saying! I havent been working somewhere for 5 years but my job is so easy and slack i basically get paid for 40 hours when i really work about 15 a week and sit at home the rest! I am so bored and feel like life is passing me by! Sometimes i wonder why i am running thru this life trying to accomplish anything….and now that i have the job and $$ to get whatever i want there is nothing out there i really desire. I feel bored, dissatisfied, unimportant..on and on and on…i think this is a big american thing!
Leave a Comment