Comments on: Fear of being alone http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/ Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values Wed, 01 Feb 2012 22:30:49 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Ayman http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12446 Ayman Sat, 16 Jun 2007 16:21:21 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12446 In response to your reply in order to pick the right person for the job or the right guy it is necessary to be a good judge of character. The reason why someone who is incompetant or does not have good character is hired is because the person who hired him was either desperate to hire people or was not a good judge character. They did not ask the right questions that would expose them for who they are. If you want to determine if someone is dishonest or of not good character you just have to ask the right questions. If someone is honest or telling the truth everything should fall into place. If someone is lying or dishonest then there will be inconsistencies and somethings just won't add up. Judging somebody's character is not something you learn from studying or reading a book. It is something you get from experience. You can't just judge people by what they say. You have to look deeper than that. You have to analyze what choice of words they use, their tone of voice, their facial expressions, and their body language. Being social and meeting lots of people is important too. When get to know lots of people you start to categorize them into different types. Everywhere you go you will find people of the same type. When you get to know the different types of people you will figure out which ones are most compatible with you. In response to your reply in order to pick the right person for the job or the right guy it is necessary to be a good judge of character.

The reason why someone who is incompetant or does not have good character is hired is because the person who hired him was either desperate to hire people or was not a good judge character. They did not ask the right questions that would expose them for who they are.

If you want to determine if someone is dishonest or of not good character you just have to ask the right questions. If someone is honest or telling the truth everything should fall into place. If someone is lying or dishonest then there will be inconsistencies and somethings just won’t add up.

Judging somebody’s character is not something you learn from studying or reading a book. It is something you get from experience. You can’t just judge people by what they say. You have to look deeper than that. You have to analyze what choice of words they use, their tone of voice, their facial expressions, and their body language.

Being social and meeting lots of people is important too. When get to know lots of people you start to categorize them into different types. Everywhere you go you will find people of the same type. When you get to know the different types of people you will figure out which ones are most compatible with you.

]]> By: Faten http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12431 Faten Sat, 16 Jun 2007 13:54:09 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12431 aaaaaaaah getting dumped is the worst. but i think that having some crash and burn relationships is good to a person, it gives you spine and makes you more in touch with the real world. speaking from my very own personal experience -if it's worth anything to you- you can think about this as long as you wish, and you can psycho-analyze your insecurities and your desires to the deepest extent, but for things to start happening you need to pick yourself up and start living. you don't know what tomorrow brings and you don't know what type of guys you'll meet so why worry about the comparison from now. aaaaaaaah getting dumped is the worst. but i think that having some crash and burn relationships is good to a person, it gives you spine and makes you more in touch with the real world.
speaking from my very own personal experience -if it’s worth anything to you- you can think about this as long as you wish, and you can psycho-analyze your insecurities and your desires to the deepest extent, but for things to start happening you need to pick yourself up and start living. you don’t know what tomorrow brings and you don’t know what type of guys you’ll meet so why worry about the comparison from now.

]]> By: Mona http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12342 Mona Sat, 16 Jun 2007 00:20:41 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12342 hi jason, i think the reason that i write in my blog and share my feelings is because i feel alone and i want anyone to listen to me and try to help me out.. sometimes being alone all the time gives me crazy ideas.. :( hi jason,

i think the reason that i write in my blog and share my feelings is because i feel alone and i want anyone to listen to me and try to help me out.. sometimes being alone all the time gives me crazy ideas.. :(

]]> By: Jason http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12341 Jason Sat, 16 Jun 2007 00:06:45 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12341 "I am the lost and confused person who is afraid to be rejected and unwanted again." I think this statement reflects the core of your problems with close relationships. You're not allowing anyone to get too close and find reasons to reject them before they can get closer and reject you. It's not that there's no one around who you can trust, it's that you're not giving anyone the chance. You think that no one likes you personally and that there's something wrong with you. But that's simply not true. Where's the evidence? Lots of people read and comment on your blog. So they must like you and what you have to say. No? “I am the lost and confused person who is afraid to be rejected and unwanted again.”

I think this statement reflects the core of your problems with close relationships.

You’re not allowing anyone to get too close and find reasons to reject them before they can get closer and reject you. It’s not that there’s no one around who you can trust, it’s that you’re not giving anyone the chance. You think that no one likes you personally and that there’s something wrong with you. But that’s simply not true.

Where’s the evidence?

Lots of people read and comment on your blog. So they must like you and what you have to say. No?

]]> By: Owen http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12338 Owen Fri, 15 Jun 2007 23:45:59 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12338 There will always be some mystery surrounding ralationships and love. You can't always go by what you feel and also can't do it in cold logic either. There is no perfect person, no one soulmate (at least in my opinion). Everyone has their flaws and shortcomings. The ones you love become the closest to you, thus they are the ones who can hurt you the deepest. Give people a chance. I know that the world is full of idiots, so it takes time to sift through them. At the same time there is someone out there doing exactly as you are, looking and trying not to lose hope that their is someone out there they are compatable with. Just stay positive and don't let one bad experience haunt you.. let it go. I don't know what it is about you, but I keep wanting to try and make you smile. I don't even know you, but I feel bad when I read about the pain you feel and the loneliness and it makes me want to do something to make you happy. I know that sounds really sappy, sorry. Just smile, and think of the possibilities. lol hope i don't sound too pushy in that comment. talk to you later There will always be some mystery surrounding ralationships and love. You can’t always go by what you feel and also can’t do it in cold logic either. There is no perfect person, no one soulmate (at least in my opinion). Everyone has their flaws and shortcomings. The ones you love become the closest to you, thus they are the ones who can hurt you the deepest.

Give people a chance. I know that the world is full of idiots, so it takes time to sift through them. At the same time there is someone out there doing exactly as you are, looking and trying not to lose hope that their is someone out there they are compatable with. Just stay positive and don’t let one bad experience haunt you.. let it go.

I don’t know what it is about you, but I keep wanting to try and make you smile. I don’t even know you, but I feel bad when I read about the pain you feel and the loneliness and it makes me want to do something to make you happy. I know that sounds really sappy, sorry. Just smile, and think of the possibilities.

lol hope i don’t sound too pushy in that comment. talk to you later

]]> By: Mona http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12336 Mona Fri, 15 Jun 2007 23:20:03 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12336 hi Ayman, you must like to write a lot.. i love it.. and i love your advice. it's quite interesting.. but i don't think picking a guy is like a job interview.. even in job interviews you pick a person who may not be the best, or over time shows his true self and his lack of skills and true persona.. i donno, I guess i just have to just move on and try to be more open minded about these things.. hi Ayman,

you must like to write a lot.. i love it.. and i love your advice. it’s quite interesting.. but i don’t think picking a guy is like a job interview.. even in job interviews you pick a person who may not be the best, or over time shows his true self and his lack of skills and true persona..
i donno, I guess i just have to just move on and try to be more open minded about these things..

]]> By: Ayman http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/2007/06/15/fear-of-being-alone/comment-page-1/#comment-12334 Ayman Fri, 15 Jun 2007 23:15:15 +0000 http://www.rebelliousarabgirl.net/?p=748#comment-12334 Being rejected the first time hurts alot. Being rejected the second time still hurts but less so. Being rejected the third time hurts even less till eventually you become desensitized. I think what you should do is become more sociable and date and talk to many men. This way when one rejects you it doesn't hurt as much because you still have other options. You really don't want to put all your eggs in one basket. Consider picking a guy like hiring somebody for a job. You look at many resumes/profiles and from the profiles you narrow it down by selecting a few that you would actually want to talk to i.e the interviewing process. From there you can decide who you like the best i.e. the most qualified person for the job. If one rejects you no big deal move on to somebody else. Also you just don't want to have one option and just settle for the next guy that shows interest in you because more than like there will be others that are much better than him. As far as being lonely as long as you are pro-active and constantly trying to talk to and meet new people you will never have to worry about being lonely. But with meeting new people you can't be so serious all the time otherwise people wouldn't want to hang out with you. You also have to try not to say mean or negative things because again nobody will want to hang out with you. Being rejected the first time hurts alot. Being rejected the second time still hurts but less so. Being rejected the third time hurts even less till eventually you become desensitized.

I think what you should do is become more sociable and date and talk to many men. This way when one rejects you it doesn’t hurt as much because you still have other options. You really don’t want to put all your eggs in one basket.

Consider picking a guy like hiring somebody for a job. You look at many resumes/profiles and from the profiles you narrow it down by selecting a few that you would actually want to talk to i.e the interviewing process. From there you can decide who you like the best i.e. the most qualified person for the job. If one rejects you no big deal move on to somebody else. Also you just don’t want to have one option and just settle for the next guy that shows interest in you because more than like there will be others that are much better than him.

As far as being lonely as long as you are pro-active and constantly trying to talk to and meet new people you will never have to worry about being lonely. But with meeting new people you can’t be so serious all the time otherwise people wouldn’t want to hang out with you. You also have to try not to say mean or negative things because again nobody will want to hang out with you.

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