Oh shut up!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHH OMG monaaaaa wallaaa i luv u :lmao:

in ur faaaaace suckersssss

Someone’s Horny :yum:

Let’s get some perspective here:

I’m an Arab American man in the US and ironically, I came to your site a few weeks ago from another “angry self-hating” Arab young lady.

First about the list you posted: There are things that as a host that are just bad etiquette and one shouldn’t do. People come to your ‘house’ intently or haphazardly and they are your guests. You don’t chase them outside without the clothes on their backs. You don’t expose your guests, let your critics do if they so wish but you rise above that and be classy. They are in your house and if you show no regard for etiquette, people won’t come or care as much anymore. Didn’t you put this blog up to vent and share your mind with the world and make friends and chat in a safe and civil manner? Or did you put it up so that your viewpoint is the only one right and others’ to be crushed and embarrassed?

You come from the Arab world, just like many or all parts around the world. people are horny, -men and women- but we also have good values and do have standards and a great many decent people. There is no pornography produced in the Arab world with Arabs on it, so I can see how many are curious to find any out there online. I am sure there are some amateurish things in some corner, but by no means is it a sizeable industry or visible one. Good values at work? I’d like to think so. Not “Western” or “open” enough for some. I’ll let them judge.

Let your brain respond before your disaffected passion does and please rise above the temptation.

As for your feelings towards being an Arab. I wish I could find one specific thing to say to make you feel better about the whole thing. It isn’t obvious. We are born into what we are born into and we don’t get to choose our parents, our name, skin color, the heritage and religion we are brought into. We can change some of it later, but you play with the cards your are dealt.

There are so many people that are born into different backgrounds and grow up to be wonderful human beings, despite the flaws they are born into, accepting of others, balanced and proud of who they are. The Arab world is not perfect and there ar plenty of jerks and idiots in it. Not unlike many other parts of the world but you also have a lot of good to be proud of. Pick what you feel good about and you don’t have to be tarred with what you dislike, especially living in the West.

You don’t have to throw out the baby with the bath water and bring down a whole culture and insult it just because you are uncomfortable with some or all aspects. WHatever happened to diversity and respect to other cultures? Don’t you owe it to other Arabs to let them be respected and simply be? You don’t have to embrace or cheerlead or love it, just not insult it. Don’t you think it is UnAmerican or Anti-Western or Anti-modern to insult it in such an angry way as you do? If were to replace the word Arab with any other ethnicity, wouldn’t your comments be seen as very insensitive or even “racist?”

I am not saying you are, but please leave your shoes for a second and view things from a neutral position and that way maybe us, your online friends or youself can help you solve your discomfort issues and make you feel better, in an honest and open way, without inflaming things and hurting others needlessly.

I don’t care what others say or think of your writing right now, what concerns me is your sanity: I worry that someone as smart and young as you are hates such a big part of her. That is going to hinder your happiness and your productivity in life if you go on hating your heritage that strongly. You can’t be comfortable at work or in a relationship with such bitterness looming around, especially that you feel not as close to your family, so you don’t have the benefit of a close support system that itself sees you as angry. It builds up everyday.

It is ironic that many do amdire the Arab world _ one very recent example read Josh Rushing- and many more convert to Islam -mostly women too- every week and on the other hand we have the reverse problem where a couple of Arabs are not able to see the good but are only occupied by the leftover garbage and the negative that is holding them back. Arabs are not perfect and no group will ever be. The difference is Arabs used to be powerful and now that they are not, they still feel they are right in many aspects and certain traditions that have nothing to do with religion or logic make things complicated.

You don’t have to tussle with those nor let them embitter you. Focus on the good and try to feel good in your skin, otherwise you won’t be able to function fully nor foster relationships with Arabs or non-Arabs (if you feel you’re inferior or they are inferior) No one from any ethnicity would go far with that kind of a mindest and self-hate.

You have to take a deep breath and forge ahead. You are not a girl anymore but a young lady, independent and gainfully employed with a promising future, and also dealing with the real world so you will be handed the good and the bad in life and you will have to sort it out. It ain’t a prefect world, but you try and bring some sanity and fairness to it drip by drip.

I have faith you can sort it out, especially surrounded by so many great open-minded, fair and compassionate people in Canada or the US that you can emulate. Just don’t pay attention to idiots and reason with your loved ones a bit more patiently so you can enjoy their love. I am sure they do love you. The rebel in you thinks they are boring cranks from another era, but I am sure they do love you. Patience and perseverence, my friend. No amount of friends, true or fake, no amount of money, no amount of anything else can replace your family’s bond. When you lose them, you’ll start to understand. You’ll really get it when one day you have your own children. It isn’t something you can describe in words.

Good Luck

Sincerely

it’s funny how someone looked Rami Ayyash confused with Arab Girl in the search items..

My post wasn’t intended to preach anything to anyone. It is a classic response from someone who is not quite ready to hear it from a friendly yet direct source. passive aggressive stuff we’ve seen before.

Nor would my post be of any use to you most importantly nor to anyone who sees your put down of a culture on your site be exposed to an ongoing conversation, trying to explane this phenomenon of ’self-hate’ be it young people’s self-hate, Arab self-hate, American self-hate, Muslim self-hate, Christian self-hate and so many other flavors.

“Seriously, do you think the rage within me is because I am an Arab?” then you please tell us what is really your rage about. From your posts and put downs and your tags, it is mostly Arab-flavored. If I am issing something, please direct me.

“I may not be perfect” No one was saying you are not or are or should be. You admit you have some conflicting feelings, don
t you? Am I missing something? Isn’t this blog reflecting a little discomfort you have or am I making it up? My post was meant as another modest light so we can limit this needless self hate and deal with it and make it less painful. Please spare me the PC and syrupy garbage about being judgemental. Almost all of your posts are just that. When an echo is coming back the other way, then we flip the “judgemental” card. viewpoints are very relative to where one is standing.

“Naturally, why would I even discuss or insult other cultures? What will I benefit from that if I have nothing to do with them.” You miss the point. once again: IF you used the same put downs you use describing your heritage and its people on ANOTHER heritage, people would be on your back for being needlessly racist and insensitive. ie you don’t realize how harsh and needless your comment is for a large swath of mostly good people. I wish you had no discomfort, but even if you do, I am not sure it is an excuse to bash others. Does that make you feel better?

“That people who come here and post stupid comments did not have a positive intention when they came to my site to begin with. ” If you choose to be on the boundless internet, good luck trying to get into people’s mind and figure out who is wholesome in their intent or not. One can’t even do it with people in front of them. All you can go by is what they actually say while abiding by rules and etiquette. Getting down the gutter to their level is not necessary and you can defend yourself really well without such lists. You can drive your point without it. (Maybe they were drawn to the Arab Dating Services ads on the bottom of the page - that certainly is a contradiction…that pays)

” I feel that you spent too much time trying to preach to the choir.” Maybe I took the time because I do wish you well and do care. This isn’t about me or a rebuttal on behalf of ANY culture. All I am trying to tell you is try to look at the positive, focus less on the dreary and don’t bring a whole culture down because of foul moof. A lot of other Arabs and Muslims are in the same boat as you and we are all trying to figure out how to fit a lot fo things in to make it work, to make it fit the times and to live peacefully next to other friendly cultures while still being proud of ours. Nothing worng with that.

“This journal site is mine. I write whatever I like, I discuss and accept any comment I like. I have full power because I can. It is the only thing I have that makes me superior as an individual and to others.” This was uncalled for and uncharacteristic of you Mona. It smells arrogant and desperate. This isn’t a power struggle hand reach. It is a friendly well-meaning one. No need for the defensive, passive aggressive stuff.

“Only thing I have and ever will.” No it isn’t and I hope it isn’t. The bar is a lot higher, Mona. Have faith.

“So respect that please and realize that most bloggers out there are only blogging to prove one point. THEIR OWN!” You watch too many soaps and syrupy stuff, now. No the world doesn’t revolve around me nor you nor the next gal or guy or group of people. This self-centered, entitlement thinking is ruining relationships. When you open a public forum and go on about ANy group of issue, your own or other’s, it has consequence, ie people are either gratified or hurt and they will respond and you have to articulate your reason for saying such hurtful things. If you didn’t want your views challenged or disliked, then it is better to confine them to a written paper journal. On the web, it husrts others a lot more easily and please don’t make light of that ‘attack’ as if you are entitled to do anything. No one is. I am not entitiled to do 120 mph on the highway just because I like to. I can’t throw garbage on the road. I can’t take my neighbors stuff. I can’t just slam the door on my boss and not fear retribution or firing. The world does not revolve around me. My actions have consequence. Expecially public actions.

I bet you feel because you feel crabby, you can look grumpy around your family and mope if they say something you don’t like or disappear into your room to avoid thei contact, you think thatis going to solve anything. It isn’t. You’re missing the chance to make yourself heard and be part of a family, not just roomates. It is not my kids’ right to mope all the time like a carpicious teenager who didn’t get the toy or clothing or car they wanted.

If one is an adult, you don’t give up on your family. You keep trying to make them listen and be part of them and not shut them out, no matter how backwards they sound. Turn them arond your way slowly and they’ll open their eyes. The more grumpy and isolated you seem, the mosre stubborn they remain.

People are not all of a sudden gong to wake up and be exactly the way you want them. Those epiphanies just don’t happen by themsleves. You have to give them a reason to WANT to include you and change their ways to please you.

You staying at work to avoid them just delays that problem solving day. You’d be amazed how very much ready they’d be to be less of a pain if you met them with a smaile, a hug and a civil talk, while staying strong and resolute. Ultimately they love you more than you imagine.

And you have alot more friends than you’d care to know.

I am not posting a long message to tell you what you want to hear. I’ll leave that to others who want to kiss up to you with vacuous one liners that do NOTHING to help you, just pander. Nor do I write to judge or lecture or bore you or criticize you like some adverse comments do. I simply throw suggestions at you and shed some light on how to deal with these ’stern’ parents of yours and these sad feelings of yours. It could be ANY young misunderstood young person out there of any bacground or religion or part of the world. These generational frustrations are unversal.

I write this because I do wish you the best.

Most Sincerely

That was my last post, by the way. Best of Luck. So long.

Gee looking at those search terms maybe I should have arab girl or something in my blog so I could be popular too.Just kidding!

Mona: I forgot to mention how I discovered ur blog. I was actually looking for “bad arab girls” and it took me directly to this site.Can u believe it. Exactly what I was looking for! :yaay:

Those logs are crazy! I’m amazed that you could get used to it. But I delete spam full of depraved subject lines every day, without much of a second thought, so I suppose I can see how it’s possible. Only in you’re case it’s real human beings making those queries, rather than mindless spambots.

HAH!