My old sorrow,
As I read your reply to my letter I noticed that you will never change. Will never open your heart to me as I have done so to you. You are masked behind a veil of lies and treachery. Is this what the days have done to you? It made you a coward hiding behind layers of deep lies. I have never fathomed this day where I have to read a reply filled with mockery and ill will. I never till this day thought that I could have once loved such a person.
As days passed, months passed, I only saw a faded light. Where it began I have no clue. Where it ended, I could not see. I just wished that my eye sight hadn’t forsaken me. I don’t know really what you expected from me. Did you want me to beg you to take me back to your life? Did you want me to beg you to give me back an ounce of happiness I have longed for all these years?
I will never beg. I will never bow down to you or any other human. Who do you think you are? You are a mere memory. Something that I have forgotten long ago. Why did you come back? Why did you write me a letter filled with lies. Were you hoping that I am still as naive as you hoped? Did you think that I was helpless and alone without you. I think not. I will never think that you, of all beings, is worth this agony.
I shall say it once and for all. I shall tell you and tell you again, that love is blind. It blinded you and I to the point where hatred splurged from beneath our veins. It made our inner soul cry of hatred. Cry of disgust.
So let me be. Let the days tell us what is in store for the future. You cannot judge what it will be. Who are you? You are not any better than that person standing over there. Or that person laying there. No matter who you think you are. In the end, I will always be who I am, and I don’t need to live a life of lies to prove my worth to others. I don’t need to tell lies to bestow my love to others. I don’t need to tell lies to masque my true self to the one I love.
I am lucky. I will never be like you. Never.Â
-Mona
