No.. girls can’t.
I was reading ChiKapaPPi’s article about girls and them proposing to a guy, since the guy is too chicken to do it. I found it quite amusing when I read it. Honestly, it would be the worst possible thing for an girl to do.
The problem with our society is the dominance of the male gender. Although, now a days, a woman is probably as tough as a man, even tougher. So taking away from a guy his most precious possessions, the ultimate male power is ridiculous. A guy till this day is as we all know is the head of the family. How can he be the head of the family if his wife is the one that proposed to him? The one that asked him to marry her because he was too chicken to do it himself. Shouldn’t a guy know when a girl likes him? Shouldn’t he be the one, who keeps bragging about his man hood, to ask a girl to marry him?
The problem with our society, if a girl asks a guy to marry him is she will be looked down upon. Society will think she is desperate for him. That it is a one sided love full of desperation. Why should a girl by the way ask a guy to marry her? Shouldn’t a guy go down on his knees and beg?
I’m sorry. I am not trying to be a feminist in any way defending women’s pride, but it is just absurd for a girl to bow down to that level.
A guy goes down on his knees, or as in our Arab culture, he goes to her family and asked for her hand, and not the other way around.
I know. I am right about this because I heard stories of Arab girls who did that. They humiliated them selves and their families to go ask a guy to marry her. I seen it happen. It is sad. But it is a sign of desperation within our society. It is a female’s way to get out of the nest forcefully in any way possible. It is sad. I saw it happen. I witnessed it happen. I suffered through it my self.
Suffered through it my self? What? Oh I probably never mentioned this.
I guess when you are desperate and want to leave your nest so badly and hate your life so much that you want to get out of it in any way possible, then you ask someone to marry you. However, that will only make the situation worse.
Was I desperate? Yes. I was tired. Alone. Sad. I am probably the ultimate person who says nonsense and asks the stupidest things. I asked him to marry me and I didn’t care if he didn’t love me. I told him I just wanted to leave the nest. I wanted to leave my family cause they were driving me insane. I hated my life and I wanted to change it so badly that I lowered my self to that level. It is pathetic. It is sad, and that’s why I think it is the worst possible thing for a girl to ever do.
So don’t do it or you will end up like me. Desperate, sad, alone and hating life.




OH SHUT UP! You are not desperate, sad or lonley woman *slap* – effffffft what happened to you! Snap outta of it! You are fine..
Well, it’s not the matter of guys chickening out bas too many of them now discard the whole idea of marriage.. so while we women sit down with hands on our cheeks waiting for someone – any one to come knocking our doors, why not do something – and when I say that, it doesn’t mean me going after guys or acting slutty no- believe me girl – in Kuwait fee girls, they focus on a guy & they end up marrying him! That’s strategy! & we are at war with the boys
Are you ok now girl!
Chika.. life here is different than Arab world.. I guess your way of portraying the situation is different that us girls living here in the western world. It is quite different.
Hold on second here Mona. Who proposes marriage has nothing to do with who is the head of the household. Guys should not be soul head of the household. A marriage is a partnership between husband and wife. Leaving the leadership all up to the man is not fair to him and it leaves a woman open to being demeaned by her husband. I have seen countless domineering husbands who acted like the soul head of the household and it is not a pretty site. The woman is treated like some lowly underling or child. Women should have equal say in how the household is run and how the children are raised or there will be domestic trouble. Smart men realize this and foolish men ignore this at their own peril. Divorce is not cheap in Canada.
On the topic of leaving the nest, you don’t need to be married to leave it. This is Canada and you are free to leave home once you are 18 years of age. Mind you, it is easier if you have found your own place first and have the financial means to live on your own but that didn’t stop one of my friends from packing up and leaving home at 19 years of age.
While it might be not be very romantic for a woman to be the one proposing marriage to the guy, I don’t consider it anything shameful. That is my two cents worth on this topic.
A woman should NEVER ask a man for marriage. it is just a SUICIDE doing this.
What’s going on Mona, you know better than anyone of us your great value as a woman. come on…and it is NOT your fault if you did ask this jerk for marriage since they drove you crazy…
Now, what I want to say is that I noticed that whenever a girl try desperately to escape from any problem she has with her family, she just find the exact problem with her husband. I donno why but it is just what I noticed from all the experiences I heard…
In another hand, I donno what hapeened to the world and made him changing 360 degree like this..when I was little I used to watch and read arbic fairy tales about the princess and how she was too picky and refuses almost all who proposes her mariage until the one who loves come and she still does’nt accept him until he fulfill all the impossible and the miracles things and exams she put him throught.then at the end she accept…
what heppened to this world, woman used to have a lot of pride a lot od consideration from men….
anyways, still there some girls who don’t give up and still not desperate and proud of themeselves and don’t want to accept any jerk just to make their families ok..
Mona, this jerk has not the profile at all that fits you, so never give up your criterias…
Don’t be desperate, sad, alone, and hating life!!! Start doing things differently, consider changing jobs! I know you’re going back to school, that’s a good thing because it’ll keep your mind occupied and make you feel productive.
Well I don’t know how I feel about girls proposing I think that for a specific type of guy and girl that could work, but for the stereotypical arabs it seems like it’s a long shot but I don’t know, never say never. I personally have actually taken some form of initiative with guys, on 2 occasions, one of them just totally didn’t work out and the other is kind of still up in the air, but I definately don’t regret doing that!
Wow… interesting topic…i am still of the opinion that always..and never are epic impossibilities…so in the right kind of situation…if a girl proposes instead of a guy…whats the big deal?? Culture is a powerful thing though.. i prefer the partnership idea… two mature adults should be able to figure out if its “time” and if its “right” shouldnt they?? well ok.. maybe in a perfect world i havent found yet….. not to generalize or anything but i think men should be older before getting married.. i think women tend to know what they want earlier in life…or be more mature anyway.. i guess i could be wrong…there are no absolutes except one… you should NEVER put yourself down..under any circumstances.. …you might “get on” yourself about a mistake or something…but then you should resolve to let it go..and move on….. but try not to dwell on the negatives all the time..its like a drug.. i hope a wonderful positive change comes for you soon… seriously
of course im a complete negative and bitter hypocrite…but im managing..
It is ok for a woman to pursue a man as long as they follow the traditions which includes asking the woman’s family for permission to marry. My Palestinian wife was very picky with lots of guys and when she met me it was a relentless pursuit to marry me. Very flattering and much appreciated, something which will hold us close together.
I guess some guys think it is flattering.. “some”