The Levels of Friendships
Who is a real friend? What is a real friend? I use to always think that finding someone to love was hard, but honestly, finding a true friend is harder. Don’t get me wrong, I have one best friend, and that’s more than enough. However, we all want to expand our horizons and want more friends. You try really hard, but you just can’t break the barrier between you and all their other friends. Seriously, how can a person have more than one friend that they can trust? At times, one is more than enough, but some other times we feel like we need more just to be well rounded and out there communicating with other people in our society.
So you want to have more friends? Let’s say this new friend treats you just like any other person. You are never on their top priority list. To them, you are just there to fill the gap for an hour or two of their boredom. Yet, you cannot confide in them. You can’t talk to them anymore or try to be more personal because they can never take you seriously. They would never understand anything you do or say, and just accept you for “what you seemed to be” in the beginning.

Friendships have 4 different levels.
1) Acquaintance.
An acquaintance is a person who you see frequently on the bus stop, or just a person you see from time to time and have small talk with. You can’t really discuss the details of your life, but the subject of whether always comes up. And you sometimes can’t remember their first name for some reason.
2) Companion.
A companion is someone you frequently hang out with and you see daily. Could be a co-worker, your next door neighbor, or class-mate. You discuss general life topics and you confide in their opinions. You know more then just their last name, you know their kid’s names, their pet names, and their age. You may end up going to trips together and hanging out outside of your normal meeting environment from time to time.
3) Friend / Buddy.
A friend knows you very well and has been your friend for a long time. They know your likes and dislikes, your life stories, where you live, and you don’t mind buying them lunch when going out to restaurants. They are people you can discuss your feelings and emotions with. They won’t stab you in the back and take every word you ever said and turn it against you. They are people you can confide in all the time, and won’t turn their back on you.
4) Best friend / The other half
A best friend is a person you see your self through. You never question their words, their behavior, or their smelly feet. You know it was always smelly. You don’t think twice when talking to them. You have no secret to keep from them. They know every detail about you as you know of them. At times, you are mesmerized by the level of understanding between one another and the similar actions. The way they act is the same as the way you act at times that you surprise your self and wonder, am I like that? Really? This person is willing to do anything for you, and at times, you wonder that this friendship is meant to last till death do you part. You might end up grieving over them more then your own blood relatives.
To me, these are the levels of friendships. Your current friends are at any one of those levels. Some may have gone through all those levels before they reached your soul. Others, well, they will never climb up because they are very much into their own world and their own clique to care about you.
Just remember, it’s not the months, or years you have known a person, it is the way they react to you as a friend. That’s friendship. It could happen at any time, or any place and with someone you least expect.




so, I guess I don’t have a best friend.
awww don’t be sad.. I have never had a best friend in my life until up to a year or so ago..
Friendships were always and ARE always hard to make for me, I was an only child for a large portion of my childhood so of course I never had that sister or brother to hang around/annoy so I always had to make outside friendships. But being an only child also caused me to invest more in those friendships than the other person would invest, simply because I had less people to invest in. I’m sure most people have someone who you consider a higher level of friend than they consider you.
My current problem however is that I operate on a general level near what you term “companion” but never get any higher with most people — and it’s because I just do not know how to do so, it’s a lack of knowledge and an abundance of knowledge of my own faults/insecurities. A bit frustrating but there are so many people and places in the world it’s quite easy to pick up and start over with a new group so I don’t let it bother me.
I currently have 2 best friends, one is my significant other (I actually do have love, 5 years, probably get married in another 4) and another is a friend I’ve known since I was 15 and I can tell her just about anything.
Oddly, I’ve found it easier to progress to higher levels on your list with people of the opposite sex, and I’m not entirely sure why.
Oh and by the way, since you play the DS, do you have the feather stylus? If you own Zelda: Phantom Hourglass you can send in the little card that comes with it and they’ll send you a free one. I urged my SO to do so and she has not regretted it as it is far more comfortable in your hand than the regular stylus.
PS Is there a comment preview button? I tend to make lots of little spelling errors and I like to go back and fix those…
Great insight..
I don’t have the comment preview thing because.. well.. hmm.. lool. I think I had issues with it with my theme. I can’t remember. I will investigate!
I do have Zelda, Phantom Hour Glass. The game is amazing. I just need to finish it! It’s so annoying at some parts!
Great post! I totally agree, it’s definitely not about how long you’ve known people, it’s about the experiences that bring you together. Quality not quantity
(Also, I’m glad the full posts show on the main page! And that the “Popularity %” is gone, I never did figure that out…)
I had to put it all on the main page because the RSS feeds weren’t working for ppl unless I did that.
Also.. I never figured out what the popularity thing is either!
As the level progresses higher, the number of persons in that level reduce. So, I have plenty of companions and only handful of friends and only one best friend. Very good post.