Being downgraded
I didn’t want to discuss this, but eventually I would have had to. So, at work, we are getting kicked out of our lab. They want us out, and we were giving two split little grad student’s rooms instead on the other side of the building.
Ehm.. yah.
So, I have been living in denial and trying to just not think about it no more and just be happy and smiling and upbeat about the move. This is our last week in the big computer lab with no windows. I have been working there since 2002. Can you imagine getting kicked out of the place that started it all?
I am just not happy and it is more of a reason that I want to leave this job. Getting out of that room is like putting behind everything for the past 5.5 years. Closing a chapter in my life. It is like ending a book that was not meant to end this way. A tragic and horrible ending that was completely unexpected. Not only that, I feel that I will never go up career wise. I was just put down so much. I feel like I am nothing. I am worth nothing at all at this job and it hurts. People grow, and I can’t at all.
At times I blame my self for all this. I should have left when I had the chance. Now, everything just fell apart and gone to the worse. Only a few more weeks at this place and I should be out. I have been job hunting like crazy. I have to leave. I don’t want to feel worse than I am. Being downgraded so badly and for what? What have I done to deserve this treatment?
Oh I forgot. I am just a programmer, nothing more.
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Mona, to quote YOU: “Closing a chapter in my life. It is like ending a book that was not meant to end this way. A tragic and horrible ending that was completely unexpected. Not only that, I feel that I will never go up career wise.”
I’ve been there… at least three times, maybe four… for the moment, I’m in a good place. You’ll find a good place again, but always be ready to bend and float, just in case.
May you be blessed with a wonderful job soon: as the old saying goes: when a door slams shut, a window opens… something like that…
Peace!
Dave
Mona… A quick question here (Sort of related to this post):
Does anyone at work know about this blog? If so… How the hell have you kept your job? If they don’t know, then why not?
If I was you Mona I would get leaving! Your so unhappy and this is your chance and the kick your looking for!
I find a good workspace to be vital to working well. If the job you have doesn’t have one, find one that does. You can do any job in the world and be appreciated, or any job in the world and be undervalued. It’s nothing to do with being a programmer (hey, I’m a coder myself), and everything to do with being in a place where people understand that you get the best from people who know their stuff is worth doing right – and they only get that if the people around them show them that at every level, from workspace to equipment to people-stuff.
Beware as much of the place that lets you slack off as the place that gets in your face for nothing. Neither is good, although the first may feel like it at the time. Both rot the soul. Find somewhere with a mission you can be proud of, with others who believe in it too.
@Lee – some people know.. mostly my boss.. he knows about this site.. and he has nothing to do with our work place change.. it was higher ups who do..
I’ve had similar situations happen to me quite a few times, and I can tell you that from those experiences nothing but good has come from them. It is tough at the time of course, but keep your head up and you will find something that makes you happier and more successful in your job and in life!
“It is like ending a book that was not meant to end this way.”
Sounds like it’s time to start writing a sequel.