The end of the circle is located at?

You might wonder what the picture is supposed to symbolize and why my life is circular. I have decided to draw out the above picture for various reasons and to illustrate my life. My life has 3 points. Point A, which is my realm of reality. Point B, which is my idealistic world, and the inner loop of AB that just wants to dance with the other circle and say, “I am here to play around with your life and make sure that points A and B are always going back and forth and really don’t mean anything!” Hence, that’s why points AB are fucking annoying.

That’s my life. A huge circle within another circle that goes back to the same points. Round and round they go.

Why am I talking about circles and points? Do I have a point? Actually, I am a bit frustrated at how people perceive me through my blog and real life. That’s my real point and this situation got really annoying. It’s funny the difference between the two groups of people. People who know me in real life, and read my blog for pure entertainment and they KNOW who the real Mona is. And there is the other group of people who think they know me by making judgments about me through my blog, and they want to relate what I say on my blog to my real life. There are these points A and B, and the intermixing of both points that really have no end. It is just a messed up thing.

I am just really sick of it. I decided from now on that I WILL NOT tell people about my site. I mean NEVER EVER until they know me. I know I am being a hypocrite about this since my best friend has really met me through this blog. However, this is what happened. She found my blog, and read it for a bit, and saw some posts that related to her life and she lived in the same city as me and I was able to easily meet up with her. So she emailed me and said, ‘YOU WANT TO MEET UP TOMORROW!!?” I said, “sure.. why not.” I didn’t even chat with her, nothing. Just got her phone number and met up with her for lunch. After that, we just started hanging out and knowing one another as friends, and NEVER had this problem with my blog effecting her judgment of me. Same goes for some other people that know me first, and one day out of the blue I gave them my blog link, and they just read it for entertainment purposes, and know who I really am. They don’t judge because they know who I am.

Then you got the people from point B that seriously don’t know me in real life and think my BLOG is the answer. What I write on my blog is MY opinions about certain matters, and life situations that piss me off or amuse me. It’s my only place to vent! I have a tortured soul that needs to be relieved from reality. And reality sucks! So I write. What I write about my self is my inner soul speaking just to relieve stress. If one day I say, “omg.. I feel like shooting my self…” DOES NOT MEAN I WOULD EVER DO IT! We all vent. That’s what I don’t understand. Why CAN’T I VENT without being judged! That’s what I don’t understand at all. People think I am crazy or suicidal or just plain lonely. I don’t understand why people think I am this poor soul. Is it because I am the only PERSON who dares talk publicly about what is going on in my head? You people think I am the only one. NO! Believe me, I have met the most messed up people that seriously need a blog and they would be FAMOUS just from writing about 10% of their life. Their life is crazy and unbelievable that they make me look so lame.

So really people from the other realm.. get a grip. Seriously! You don’t know me. I am not easy to figure out. People either HATE me or LOVE me, and it is NOT from my site. Only 5 people in my real life know about my blog, and I prefer to keep it that way, and NOT ONE day did they ever make a judgment about me. They don’t need to, they know who I am. This blog is only 10% of what goes on in my head and life. That’s all.

Does anyone else have this problem as a blogger? This circular mayhem!
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Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!