Something about being an Arab really irritates me and probably will till the day I die! It’s Arab parents. Their persistence and their constant nagging is one of the reasons I started getting gray hair at the age of 24 and having my life completely messed up cause of them! Their constant nagging lead us to lying because they don’t understand and they never will. They just think that life is black and white and what they say is the ultimate and only answer. The moment you try to even express your self you get shut down quicker than an illegal drug operation!
I my self don’t think that way, and because I am always treated like this, I act the complete opposite and I don’t talk or give my opinion in anything. I think that’s another reason I resorted to having a blog, to say what’s on my mind, because I don’t talk or say anything in real life. I am just pissed because I am sick of this mentality. Moreover, this mentality hasn’t changed even in my generation. I know people who act exactly like their parents. I will never call it traditions. These are not traditions, but closed minded idiotic mentality and the fear of change and accepting people for the way they are!
Why can’t the old generation conform to change and accept the consequences? I swear at times I feel like I want to keep hitting my head on a wall so I can go unconscious for a month or two so someone will feel sorry for me and I can take a vacation from the constant demands and nagging!
I swear, if I was a singer I will only be singing songs about being pissed from the mentality of Arabs!
Oh my people!
Oh how much I want you to change,
So our generation can live in harmony!
Oh my people!
Why can’t there be a compromise?
Why can’t there be some understanding?
Oh my people!
Why do we have to conform to traditions?
Why do we have to live this double life to satisfy you?
Oh my people!
Why do I have to resort to writing to others,
So my mind will be at ease knowing someone out there listens?
Oh my people!
I want to live in peace.
Let me live in peace!
Yah.. I am pissed but I am not moody. I have always been like this and I try to be fake and cheerful at times so people won’t think I am going crazy. I think the coffee calms me down a bit, but drinking 2 full mugs of coffee before 9 am is not good! One time I didn’t drink coffee and I had the biggest headache on earth! However, believe me, I totally lost it long time ago, and this is my honest reaction to what I can’t stand! It’s enough I keep making up excuses of how much I hate my job, which I do with all my heart, but I am sick of hating! I am sick of living a life I can’t stand because of the people around me! Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
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My name is Mona and I am an internet savvy and technology obsessed girl. I am originally Palestinian and I live in the province of Ontario in Canada. That's some info about me, and you can learn more [
so when they gonna feel bored from youtube ? 
there is even a book that claims... 
Wednesday, July 23rd 2008 at 11:36 am
Well, I am moody and pissed! go figure! you see, you are right about some kids lying to their parents who are that way only because it’s the way Arab societies work you know.. we can’t disregard religion obviously in this case bas the traditions play an important role, especially for us females. But we can’t really generalize on that because some parents are willing to be open minded to some degree of course. How about having parents that don’t care? Or one of them at least.. Wouldn’t that result in even worst cases? I am currently not happy with a couple of things at home.. I used to be a rebel, not listen and act the opposite just like you till I learned my lesson the hard way.. still am but it sure is nice when you go home to someone who cares.. ahh Mona,this is a tough subject
Wednesday, July 23rd 2008 at 11:39 am
I don’t have a problem with the non-caring part. On the contrary, they care too much but sometimes I wonder if it is for my sake or for their own sake? Like is it for their gratification in front of people or for the sake of their kids?
Wednesday, July 23rd 2008 at 11:48 pm
I find that a lot of parents act a certain way to keep up appearances in front of their friends, co-workers and their cultural community. I pray to God I don’t carry that with me.
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 1:48 am
You can either gather your courage and tell your parents how u feel about them and how much they have been a failure in raising you,one way to do that is to write them a letter expressing your feelings. Or you can just pack your stuff and leave…Why are you putting yourself through this misery?? I personally think your parents should kick you out
..Or maybe some people,sadly some grown ups, tend to blame others for all the shit they’re going through without taking any responsibility..Just do something about it and don’t count on sympathy on cyberspace to do you any good or boast your self-esteem.
Peace
إذا رأيت نيوب الليث بارزة ** فلا تظننّ أن الليث يبتسمُ
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 7:02 am
Just wanted to chime that this is so true, it’s not even funny. It’s not sad or depressing, either, more a fact of life like the mid-east Sun; you just live with it. You got seared by the parents? Well tough luck, you know how parents are, you should have avoided it somehow.
I guess I hope, like June, to avoid turning into them. Now that’s the hard part. :/
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 7:33 am
You can’t change the older generation. They’re wired that way after all these years. And when you grow up your kids will say the same about you.
The only person you can change is you. You can influence others but you can’t possibly change them unless they decide to change themselves.
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 7:52 am
Dear Mona, unfortunately it is mostly for their sake and this very selfish. Moreover, this is not something unique to Arab world, this is something universal. Maybe statistically it is being seen less in Western cultures but basically it is universal.
It is very important to express anger. You should keep expressing your anger or you would become less healthy, especially mentally.
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 8:01 am
Well, something I forgot to mention… Same here with the coffee. I love turkish coffee and drink usually 3 cups a day (by cups, I mean mugs). It is interesting that for the majority of people coffee is adding to their anxiety (for caffeine is a stimulant) but for me it is a tool for relaxation. I sometimes even have coffee at night before sleep to get some relaxation.
Thursday, July 24th 2008 at 4:13 pm
Hey, found your blog via Problogger. This post just blew my mind. If I got it right, my parents are just like yours. But I am not sure if its old generation thing, you know. In my case, I think they are hardwired somehow to see only extremities. Although I am from Bangladesh, the social structure may be great influence on them. Mine just push me whenever they feel I am not doing what everyone else is doing, which really bugs me.
Anyway, enough complaining. Good luck
Sunday, July 27th 2008 at 3:55 pm
I’m not sure it’s just Arab parents that nag, but I think Arab parents tend to nag their daughters more than their sons.
I understand how having a blog helps. I feel my family has gotten to know me better by reading my blog than by living with me for a few decades!
Having said that, my dad was very nontraditional in the way he raised us. Something he may have regretted later since I turned agnostic.
I think the best arrangement is when one has their parents close enough to visit once a week or so but not in the same house which can be suffocating!
Tuesday, August 5th 2008 at 10:05 am
Well, this something every Arab girl in Earth suffers from especially when it comes to living in a country other than yours my dear. To be honest with you, I used to have the same when dad was alive!!
Don’t be shocked, but I swear I miss it now!
Part of me missing is is because I MISS HIM around and part of it is my mom being changed because she lost him!!
Am I making sense, sorry!! My mind is being blocked I guess!!
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