Every time someone speaks to me and wonders what I am doing in my life, they throw this phrase, “why don’t you do something productive?” Ok? I think to my self, so if I am beyond weak, my brain is a roller coaster and is a bit all over the place, and the last thing I can think of that takes more than 2 brain cells to compute is doing something productive.
I don’t feel like thinking about it now. I really don’t. I don’t know what this productive thing they are thinking of. If I watch TV, isn’t that productive? If I read a book, isn’t that productive? Writing and maintaining websites, isn’t that productive? Being a social active internet person who knows all the latest news, isn’t that productive? WHY DOES HAVING A JOB AND WORKING THE ONLY THING LABELED IN OUR SOCIETY AS BEING PRODUCTIVE?
Some people say I am wasting my talents. I say I am enhancing them by reading and getting to know what’s out there. When I wasn’t sick I was actually exploring new realms of life. Trying to understand what my talents are. What talents do I have? What can I, as a girl, as an Arab girl living in Canada, do to be part of this society and become something important. Maybe that’s the problem, I always wanted to be something important and recognizable within my society. Maybe that’s why I maintain this site with all my heart. It’s because I am doing something important. I am known to stand for something and have my voice heard about issues that people don’t know how to discuss. Isn’t that productive?
I am craving more fruits. That’s all I have been eating, and sweet savory grapes make me sleepy and my brain numb. Eating is also productive… because it keeps you healthy.