Fifteen-Fifteen

For me I think divorce is better than being single when children are involved. Because then at least I would know something good came out of it. That is just my opinion. Some people might think it’s a big time failure when kids are involved and you should be more ashamed because you got divorced with kids. But as for this post, I think I rather be single forever than be unhappily married. Mona, you are ok. Trust me, marriage can be the worst thing that could ever happened to you and sometimes it can be all you ever wanted. So hopefully, we will all find that one person that will love and adore us inshallah. Take care until then.

I think it’s easier for men to be single as long as they please. But for women, yea we can be single as long as we want too. But an important factor to consider is if the woman wants children. Women have a age limit to have children unlike men. Some of the women on both sides of my family seem to need hysterectomies in their 20’s and 30’s. I know that I want children oneday, so i always keep that in mind.

Sorry I know I went a little off topic.

I am curious to learn from the 15% that said being single is the worst, why did they pick that answer?

It all depends on the mentality of the person and who he/she surrounds themselves with. Because being ’single’ in today’s society is looked upon as normal. Some women get married around their 30’s and they dedicate their time to nourishing a blossming career, going out with friends and finding out who they ‘truly’ are. If all of your friends are getting married that might bring you down as well so it might be best to surround yourself with other people who are single and are going out and experiencing life. In my opinion however going through a divorce would be worse. Yeah some say it’s better to have loved then lost but to each their own I guess.

You never know you might be able to find the one through some friends. Open your horizions and interact with different people, my fiance is strict-arab palestinian and I’m mexican. So you never know. Alhamdillah he showed me the way to god and I thank him for that. Just my 2 cents.

I might understand the ‘unhappily married’ and ‘divorced’ but can’t understand at all how ’single’ is worse? It’s obviously better than being divorced for whatever or keeping the oneself tided to an unsucsseful relationship just to preserve the ‘image’ … C’mon!

Of course I’m not aganist marriage, but I think it’s all about compatibility so not to find ourselves between nareen (two fires) of divorce and unhappy marriage.

Being single or divorced is better than being in an unhappy marriage, I think. But having to choose between single and divorced…um…..I don’t know. It will depend on who you are. People like me couldn’t care less what others think of my single status at this age (since I’m also approaching expiry age as they say), but to other people, they might prefer divorced to avoid people talking and bugging them about the marriage question especially as they get older…Others also prefer divorced even when there are kids in question – especially when there are kids in question – because their lives change to circle around the kids whom they love very much, and they think the best part of the marriage was the divorce & kids (as long as they can support themselves financially of course, plus the kids solve the loneliness problem). It’s not a personal opinion, but just a different opinion judging what I see around…..

With kids or without kids, people go through trauma as a result of divorce. I personally know people who have been abused, etc, to finally realize they can’t leave with the person anymore.
Nay, I say. Patience is a virtue, and I would rather die alone knowing I had done all I could to ward off the wrong type of men. And I am not interested in having kids from someone other than the one I love and who loves and respects me in return. Pretty rebellious, huh?

P.S. I can’t spell apparently. I meant ‘can’t live with the person’, not leave. I was too quick to hit the button

I wonder, how many who voted, realized you could divorce your unhappy marriage partner…?

Since an equal number voted for single and divorced, it seems like the majority of the pollers were not married.

Perhaps you should do another poll… “were you married at 28?” With answers such as, Yes, No,

Personally, I don’t see Single & Divorced as always being better or worse than each other. Divorce has a stigma attached to it that it doesn’t deserve all of the time. For example: Is a 27 year old who was married for 6 months before their spouse had an affair & then leaving the marriage any different than a 27 year old who has been cheated on by their bf/gf leading to a break up? Some divorces are out of a person’s control since marriage takes two people.

Speaking for men…
I cannot speak for women, but as a man who remained unmaried longer than most, I did not mary untill I was 30. I had no intention of getting married. But it is not easy, your married friends distrust and resent you because you are single. At some point there is a creepy old unmaried guy element to it. So it is not easy. I got this alot, “how come you have never been married, something must be wrong with you?”

For women of the same age that were never maried what I was told is that they were “carear” women or “independent” I am gald that the old sterotype (at least in some circles) has changed. But still I think single is better than bad relationships but there is a price to be paid for resisting the trends for men and women.@Lela

Personally it comes down to choice. We all want to have the choice to be single, be in an unhappy marriage or be divorced. We don’t want to be forced into any of the three scenarios. For me, being unhappily married is far worse than being single or divorced because I would feel trapped. Nothing scares me more than the feeling of being stuck in a bad situation, because I’ve seen a lot of women young and old caught in unhappy marriages.

I am very happily married, by the way, because my husband and I choose to be with each other.

hello, i was just wondering why you think being divorced would be worse than unhappily married?

i was unhappily married and i assure you, it was worse than when i was divorced! being divorced was fun, because i was free! i was happy and i got to rebuild myself again…

i got married at 20 and divorced at 23. nothing wrong with that. he was not worth my time and so i left.

i am now remarried and i love the man i am with. so, getting divorced allowed me to be happy and do life my way.