Married to my job
Almost literally.
Where do I even begin? You see, it’s great being busy. It’s super great being super busy, but when you are expected and required to be there anytime and working all day long, and even nights and weekends, then you get tired. My social life, like I had one, is pretty much contained in one place, with about 15 people and random strangers coming by all the time.
It’s ok, I am not stressed or complaining. I am just stating why I have been sluggish in my writing or doing other things in my life. I can’t do much! Well, if I had time, I would be watching movies, shopping at the mall, and not sitting on the computer.
My company is small, but the niche is big, and we are the first ones doing software for that niche. Which is super great! I am slowly given the higher responsibilities of managing the software product since I am very active and interactive with everyone else; it being outside or inside the office. I even do software demonstration and explain things in plain old English. (Like teaching!)
The hardest thing I ever had to do in my life as a software designer is translating technical jargon to plain English. It’s hard, but I am slowly training my brain to do so, and it is very challenging.
Many of you have noticed that I am very critical and very harsh in judging other people’s websites, which I think 90% of the websites on the internet are hideous, but I am a damn picky person! I like things pretty! I like things that are “wow!” I like things user friendly! I like things to stand out from the rest!
See my mentality?
Who wants to marry a girl like me now who is almost literally stuck to something else in life?
Some people have or had a serious problem with me getting this new job. I have become distant or pretty much unreachable. I just work too much, and I am expected to do so. It’s fun, challenging, and I feel that I am needed. Having to throw all that away for other people, especially a guy or whatever, is really not going to make me happy. If you think I should learn to balance it out, then dudes and dudettes! Seriously! I don’t even have time to do my own laundry or cook edible dishes that other humans will enjoy. Does it look like I can balance anything out? I have focus problems. 
Right now I am happy, but I don’t know what will happen to me or the way I think in 5 years. Because believe me, 5 years ago I didn’t think this way. 5 years ago I wanted to get married, settle down and be like everyone else. However, trying to be like everyone else is a big chore, and something you have to convince your self to do. I am not easily convinced anymore. I am very stubborn, I like to analyze all the possibilities, and then make a final decision. My decision right now to enjoy having a career and getting somewhere in life.
Oh, by the way, for those that repeatedly tell me that they can’t believe that I am a nerd, and don’t look like one at all, then beware! We are worse than those people who do look like nerds! 
Blah Blah, Programming, Random Thoughts, They said what?, Whatever!
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I looove FouseyTube!! All of his videos are... 
i cant understand it
You’re fine being married to your job, Mona. It’s 100 times better than being stuck in a headache-causing and sigh-inspiring relationship. At least your job provides you with something a guy can hardly ever give: FUN!
Who needs guys anyways?
Go make that money, honey! =) x
I wouldn’t like celebrate my promition on the day of my break up ‘.’
I have met and seen people in their late twenties or early thirties trying to conquer everything they are passionate about. Nobody has to agree or disagree here, everyone’s has their own perspective and priorities in life, some bound by social norm and some too afraid to take a new path.
The irony is; what ever path you choose; they all converge to a single rendezvous point which is undeniable. (I.e. 6 feet under).
For some or usually most people, in their forties or fifties; they become too lonely and end up being psycho with no family or someone or something to look upto. At a certain, point in life; money becomes too useless since you won’t have anyone to spend on to. How many designer bags, clothing line, exotic vacations, partying would one need to satiate oneself? Eventually everybody gets over it and by the time usually one realizes; it’s already too late!
I replied with an assumption that you are a practicing Muslim (at least morally) vis-a-vis your social and religious obligations.
Otherwise, choosing new ‘partners’ every few months or year is the best medicine followed by 80% of the struggling educated ‘west’!
One day your whole life would be flashed before your eyes; let’s hope it’s worth it!
Mona, I think all good programmers are a bit (or more than a bit!) obsessive about their work! I seriously haven’t ever met a programmer who was worth a damn who wasn’t. I sometimes think there needs to be a way to test people for that personality trait during job interviews! I can’t believe you were talking about changing careers a few months ago… in my opinion you’ve already found the best profession for somebody like you
As far as finding somebody who will put up with you investing that much of yourself in your job, people like that are out there. Seeing as how I’m divorced I may not be the best person to be giving advice, but I’d say anyone who isn’t looking to you to “complete” them may be a good candidate! And really, who wants a needy person like that anyway? The best marriages are partnerships, and a partner shouldn’t have any problem with you enthusiastically pursuing your own interests.
at least your not married to some toe kissing bum who has nothing better to do than worship your every move and cook & clean & work for you when you wanna sit around watching jeopardy all day. God that would be crappy.
@razu
Good.. I never asked you to.
@Mr G.A.G.
Fun? Well.. yah.. I guess my job is fun. Only because it is easy for me to get done. I don’t find it stressful at all.
@Mais
Right on sista!!
@}-{
Umm… I rather spend my money on vacations. You can never have enough money for so many vacations!
As a practicing Muslim, it doesn’t say anywhere in my religion that I have to marry at a certain age. Didn’t Prophet’s Mohammed (PBUH) first wife was 40 and he married her? And she was a very well off working woman. So, religiously, the social norms don’t work. Religiously, getting married has its reasons, but to only get married to be part of the social norm is not it.
@Craig
The reason at some point in time in the past year I felt like changing careers, because the thing I love to do, no one was giving me a chance to do it. When things drag on day after day, then your mind wanders to “what if?,” “maybe I should change,” etc.
@Brian
okiieee..
I think having a job is awesome. You’d get to earn and afford the things that you need. But it’s also good to relax sometimes.
You don’t have to balance things out. You could still work more, and then rest a bit.
Though I hope you’d find time to write, even just once a week.
I understand well & feel what you say. Although, It’s the first time to hear it from a girl
But I think you, me and many of software developers/designers/architects/whatever share the same fun and have the same passion about their jobs. But I wanna warn you, take care & don’t ruin you personal & social life. I regret days when I could have nice time with my family or friends & I prefered to continue working on my projects. Time never come back again. If I left my work for few hours that wouldn’t harm at all. We all know that projects may get delayed or even cancelled even while we are doing our best even when we refuse to sleep & rest. So, better to make room for things that will never come back again. Catch it Now or Never. I wish you a good luck.
– Sorry, my expressions in English may be a little unfamiliar.. I’m an Egyptian
@Waheed Sayed
I understood your comment very well. Thanks for your input.