I didn’t complain at work. I didn’t do anything. People observe and see that I am getting beyond stressed. The company is growing so fast, and there are only two programmers, me and another guy. Not only that, somehow when I started this job, I automatically was thought of as the Technical Customer Support by computer illiterate women without the bosses knowledge.

Did I go to school to become a technical support? Did I even accept this job as a technical support to customers and illiterate computer women at work? No. They just kept piling the work on me and make me do it because I was the only one responsive. I was polite and I never said no. That’s my problem, I don’t tell people to back off because I have more important things to get done.

So today, we finally had the “meeting.” Oh, some old bitchy women were not happy with the decision. The bosses said, “Mona is no longer doing technical support at all unless it is critical.” In my head I was like YES! God answered my prayers and I am back to doing what I was hired to do. You guys should have seen me yesterday at work. Oh my Lord! My blood pressure was up the roof. I got a very bad migraine and I couldn’t see anymore. I could feel my hair turning gray from all the stress. I was about to explode.

Later in the meeting, one of the bosses said, “The problem is that you guys are taking advantage of Mona because she is PLEASANT and always says YES! She is very polite.”

See people! This is me in real life. I am very quite. I never say no and very nice to everyone. You guys should see me on the phone. The customers bitch at the women at work with their problems, but once they give up and tell me to talk to them instead, then the customers have a totally different tone. The customers love me and always say before they say good bye, “Thanks Doll!” Or they say, “Your amazing and that was so easy!” Or they say, “You are peach!”

I could be the customer support and nice to people all the time, and I am very successful at it, but I am a programmer. I like to think and problem solve.

Back to normal.. for now! However, the bosses will be away for a week.. I am scared!

Blah Blah, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, Thank you, They said what?, Whatever!

I don’t care about nasty emails or nasty comments. I am immune to them and I don’t care who wrote them. I placed a big bold message on my contact page a long time ago that says that if you insult me, then I will publicly display it. If you posted the wrong email address, then you have wasted my time. Can you imagine if someone did both? It is like a hit and run situation thinking that they will never get caught.

A lot of people think outside of the box, which is great, and they pointed out different possibilities from the previous post. That is fine, except you guys missed the bigger picture. I do not purposely provoke people to reach this level of personal insults. I don’t do it to get attention. Some said that I don’t deserve it. Most people judge me from one post, and I got used to it. People cannot accept the difference, and I am very different.

You guys think I just get nasty emails or horrible comments? Think again. Many websites and forums discuss my “teenage immature writing style” by emphasizing the very old posts that caused and still causing a commotion. I just write this way. I don’t think hard and try to come up with sophisticated attention grabbing posts. That is never my intention when I write. I just write what is on my mind, and my mind is an infinite sized mass of ideas.

Let’s think outside the box for a bit and discuss an important issue. You see, many people think when I write about Canada, that I hate being an Arab and forgot my roots. If I write about being an Arab and loving it, then people think I don’t appreciate the land that I live in now with the “better” life, and I have to thank God because many people back home don’t have food and water. There is no happy medium. No one is ever satisfied with my way of thinking or living.

I discussed a very important subject with my mother yesterday. I asked her, “Why are Arabs back home in the Arab world have serious dislike to Arabs living here?” She said, “They are just jealous and resentful of the Arabs here. The moment they get a Visa or are accepted for immigration, they will leave everything behind such as: family, friends, and loved ones without hesitating to look back. It’s the land of opportunity and it is worth it! Some of us wish to go back home and live there, but we were kicked out and told to leave our homes. It’s not like we had a choice to be here. We are lucky someone accepted us to live a peaceful life with human rights.”

While I was snooping the internet searching for the essence of my Rebellious name online, all I found was mostly negative feedback from Arabs back home toward me. They hate my site. They call me names. They ridicule me and make an instant judgment that I live in USA and that’s why my thought process is like “this.” Not like there is no other Westernized country in the world that speaks English other than USA. No no.. Auto-Arab-Judgment. Speaks fluent English: USA. Has absurd but truthful ideas: westernized Arab in USA. Totally unashamed to speak the truth: totally USA.

I learned to accept the difference and move on, why didn’t you?

Blah Blah, Culture, Idiots, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, They said what?, Whatever!

I just woke up and checked my lovely emails, and one was so straight forward and to the point, that I had to post it on my blog.

Actually, I have to post it because I tried to reply to this person, but it seems they misspelled their email or something.

Your Name: zaher
Email: lacoperon@fastpost.net
Website: http://
Message:
I am an Arab, and I think that you are a brainwashed and superficial lady, with no dignity or honor. You are a disgrace to your people and culture. Please go to Hell soon.

He asked me nicely to go to Hell soon. He said Please! All I wanted to reply saying, “See you there soon too!”

Culture, Idiots, They said what?, Whatever!

My dad pointed out that we have arrived to Canada 13 years ago today. Add that to the 5 years I lived in USA, and you got a legal age! Yep, I have been living outside of the Arab world officially for 18 years. I am officially legally westernized.

Oh dear, I cannot believe it. 13 years in this country and I spent around 12 years of it complaining. You have to realize that I had a personal website live on the inter-web back then. That’s how much of a loser I was. I wrote poems (complaining about my life), shared favourite actors pictures (Brad Pitt, Antonio Banderas, Bruce Willis, etc), and the best thing of all, I was in still in highschool studying the process of photosynthesis and the detailed stages of meiosis.

Was I destined to be a programmer? Was I destined to complain all my life? I keep telling a lady at work that all I do is complain. I just love it, and I find fault in everything. I just love perfection and being super organized. I get a headache when there is chaos and disorganization.

Therefore, I should be thankful that a country accepted us as citizens. The funny thing that 13 years ago, when I arrived to this land, it was written in my immigration papers that my country of birth nationality was the following: Stateless. I was a gal without a country. Now, I got a second beautiful home, and a beautiful story and love of my Palestinian country and ancestors to share with the world.

Blah Blah, Culture, Funny, Geeky, Happy, Programming, They said what?

Isn’t it funny that a person would admit that there is something wrong with them?

Would you admit to the world if something is wrong with you?

The Disruptive Sleeping Patterns

So here it goes. I am a mentally disturbed person, and it is getting worse daily with my lack of sleep. I sleep for about 4 hours a day now. Why? I have no clue. I just wake up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep.

Yesterday night, I woke up at 2 am and I tried to close my eyes again and doze off, then I had a weird feeling that someone is shoving me and I woke up again! I know, I am mentally disturbed. The problem is that I go to work half asleep and the high dosage of caffeine is not helping.

Bitter Thoughts Resulted from People

Isn’t it funny that people spend 100′s of dollars on clothes and purses just to show off? Yet, they were cheap asses and horrible money managers and always ask you for money for gas or food? I wonder how they would feel if someone suggested for them to donate their money to I don’t know, some organization to help children and dying people in Palestine for example.

I am Not a People Person

I don’t like people. Simple as that. But you have to realize that people are the cause of my mentally disturbed thought process. Look at me! Do I write normal? Do I speak normal? Am I typical?

Emailing Back

For those people subscribed to my blog through email must realize that you CANNOT reply back me through those emails. The return sender on those emails are noreply@rebelliousarabgirl.net. I will not answer you back if you reply to them. Come to my site and comment, or send me a question through my contact page. It’s unbelievable the number of people that have replied in the former method and bitch at me for not replying back to them.

Enough ranting for today. Time to make some coffee.

Blah Blah, Depressed, Idiots, Ranting as usual!, They said what?, Whatever!