I don’t even know where to begin yapping and complaining. But I am still recovering, or really rejuvenating. I know the hell will be back again next week, but what can I do??
I think I am at my all time depression. It used to be bad when I was like 25 and 26. But now, ultimate peek. I know why though. I think I am at an age where I want so much, I work so hard, and I have been doing it for years but I am not seeing the benefit of it. I think it is more of a change of ideology then a change of daily habits. What do you guys think?
On a better note, I am getting my Blackberry Playbook next week. I pre-ordered it and I am waiting for the release. That will cheer me up for sure!
I am also back and active on Twitter @rebelliousgirl. So add me and talk to me there if you need me ASAP or want to ask a question. I keep up with it more than the Facebook account. I need people to talk to. Life is too depressing and I need you guys to cheer me up.
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[...] Recovering… momentarily Posted by admin on April 17, 2011 random I don’t even know where to begin yapping and complaining. But I am still recovering, or really rejuvenating. I know the hell will be back again next week, but what can I do?? I think I am at my… [...]
you complain as if you are in a lawless zone. Be brave and complain to upper management if you cannot shut the problem/s using your skills. Haven’t we learn this at school? It is common sense too.
@kooler
Umm.. what if upper management is the problem.. I guess need to actively look for new work.. which I am slowly doing..
Hey Mona it is natural to feel depressed when things are going as fast as you want. Try to pace yourself and your wants. If you keep working towards your goals you will achieve them just not all at once.
Chill out and enjoy the ride of life.
Mona,
Yislam hal tim walla.
You hit the right words. Enough guys of double standards. We talk about religion and moral while we kill in the name of religion more than any other religion. Politics!!! at least in the west if a politician even a criminal when caught right handed, he resigns or admit guilt and move aside. We tend to defend the crime and cover it with some religious fatwas.
Come clean and face the truth… Your honour is in actions we do or don’t and not in the virginity. Enough bluffing.
USA’s goal is to promote fanatism through those beduins of Saudis and sheikhs to paint us all with dirt. Wake up guys, focus on knowledge, excel in what you do and until we become civilised, then talk politics and religion.
Ahlan Mona,3udta hona ba3d waktn tawil.Hasanan,arzul ma3zera but really glad that you are recovering.But it looks like I’m getting a strange premonition as I try to comprehend your words in psychological dimension metaphorically………..
@MONA
But on second thoughts, a flashback before the premonition in language of simplifier version reads… “I want to live. I want to care and I want love. I want to be capable of failing but not falling apart. I want to feel loved and cared for not neglected and ignored. I want to know and learn how not to neglect and ignore myself. I’d like like to be me. By writing this blog and asking to have someone readit, I realize I’m asking to be listened to, to be heard, to be understood, to be treated as a living person who is hurting so much inside and needs to be cared for and who needs some kind compassion to help me keep going and discover some way to ground myself. This notebook (Macbook perhaps) says more than any verbal discourse because it’s a concentrated effort of really writing down how I am.It’s true it’s painful and it hurts do to this but at least I’m now allowing this pain to surface. For most of my life I’ve refused to acknowledge my feelings and this has distorted my sense of myself. I’ve not been able to have any clear sense of who I am but since I’ve allowed myself to write things down I’ve become much clearer about the person that I am inside.
Writing is becoming a comfort to me especially on blog where many people get to see it and of course I get to discuss it and it oozes my state of melancholy. It’s virtual wall where I can express myself without any judgment. It is a sanctuary of hope where I can begin to discover things I do not know of myself. It’s a labyrinth of words, thousands upon thousands, which I needed to relocate a sense of myself. I need to write so much. I have to. It’s only when I write That I begin to effectively identify something about the way I feel and in doing so ,I become definite who I am”…………
“I know the hell will be back again next week, but what can I do??”
Well,let me see.My take on this is fair and simple and I assure you will never have to go through the nightmares of depression.
Depression is like an assignment in life that nobody ever sets for you to do. No one tells you beforehand how difficult it’s going to be, how time-consuming it is, how painful it can be.You’re not prepared for it and when it happens you want to give it all away and collapse into nothing .Because there are no real signs, no real markers, no sheets handed out beforehand telling you what it’s going to be like. And before you know it you’re being judged, not on your progress but on your failures, on your weaknesses. The judge isn’t a fair one with guidelines and suggestions. The judge is yourself, the worst around, who shatters your confidence and who plays on your vulnerabilities until you get to the point where you want to break. You want to give up on this assignment which seems so wasteful and pointless. But it’s really the most important assignment you’ll be given. It’s an essay which is long and tiresome but where you must come out with full marks. Those full marks won’t be given for content or structure or quality. They’ll be given each time you believe in yourself and care for you a little more. And you’re the one giving yourself the grade, because you’re the one giving yourself those stars. The assignment is you, and you are the judge, the expert the one who knows you and cares about you enough to say, “I’m worth it, I’m worth 100 per cent.
Shukran……. .Estamte3 Al-hayah.E3tani be nafsek…..
@Fouad
Umm.. hi Fouad. I am not sure why you decided to write so much, but this is not a psychology essay and an psychological analysis of my personality.
Anyways, thanks!!
Afwan..La da3i li-Shukr.Happy to see you that you have resurrected the exciting moments in your course of Life…Araki fi ma Ba3d be kulle ta3kid!!!