I hope I mentioned this in earlier posts, but remember my bro was here last week? So was my aunt and cousin. However, I always wondered why my mom thinks the way she does. She has such an Arab mentality that drives me insane. She won’t change or ever get accustomed to a different thought process. We have been living in North America since 1992 and some mentality and thought process is still glued to a different world! Akh!! Even THAT world is changing or trying to change and the older Arabs HAVE NOT! This causes a serious conflict!
So, I was hanging out with my aunt for a couple weeks, she came from Lebanon, so I learned a lot!
They are all the same. I am serious. Nothing has changed where ever you live. My mom the same as her. I feel like I still live in a bubble with that mentality around me. All they talked about is married and unmarried girls. Virgin and non-virgin girls. What is right and what is wrong. Blah blah blah! It drove me insane. What world do we still live in?
Thank God no one picked on me, cause they know better. I don’t like Arab mentality. I like Arab morals and ethics, and that’s it. Anything else that is so tabooed in the culture drives me insane. I have seen Arab TV shows, music videos, etc. They are FILLED with sex and exposing women to the extreme. No wonder Arabs are so agitated and do everything wrong in secret.
You can say that I am not really a supporter for what Arabs do that is wrong. I have done many wrong things in my life too, but I will never write about it on my blog. However, I have no reason to judge their life choices. I mean common! It’s human nature. Don’t Arabs have human emotions too? Learn that people! We have EMOTIONS too! However, from the number of divorced and unhappy cousins that I have, you either marry them off to any guy that will import them to a different country or let them soak in their rooms till some older desperate guy is willing to marry them.
I am neither, do don’t worry. I am stubborn as goat!
I think it is our problem, and not theirs. I feel that the generation gap between our parents and us is far greater than what I thought. Usually generation gaps are not so bad, but for Arabs, generation gaps mean night and day. I think it is what we are exposed to in this day and age is far greater than any other traditional conservative generation has ever had to endure. To me I don’t care if I kiss a guy or not. At the same time, I do care and say what the frigg when I see two Arabs making out in public in a very explicit way. So it is more of a middle ground and how I interpret things.
I lived here long enough that I don’t get shocked that easily. Everything is just there and I say whatever. I just want to find a happy medium. I have not found it yet, and I never will. I will just live with it. Complain about it. And I hope someday my grammar improves so I can whine some more about it when some company is willing to accept a rebellious Arab girl as their next short story author. It will never happen, but only pray for me! I want to quit my day job and be an Arab culture critic. Oh the possibilities!
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You are right, it is a generational thing. It gets worse with my generation who have immigrated a few decades back. They seem to have a snap shot of how things were the day the left and this is preserved forever. I remember my surprise when I graduated and went to San Francisco to visit my cousins, I heard Ramallah accent that was not spoken anymore, it has evolved.
My generation living abroad still cling to what they knew and experienced before they left. Is it good or bad, who knows. For me it is the worst that can happen to a person, feels like the land that time forgot. They also exasperate me. I don’t agree with the everything our generation does, but it is your right to experiment and make mistakes, God knows how many mistakes my generation had done, one is being manifested in the streets of the Arab World.
So, go for it try new things as long as it is framed within our ethics and moral fabric. make your mistakes and hopefully your generation will provide a better future for the coming generations
Mona you know what they say, you can take the Arab out of the Middle East but can’t take the Middle East out of the Arab.
My dad has been in the US for 38 years and for the most part has assimilated but he has little things that we are like WTH????
I think our generation is changing. Most of us don’t have any of the hangups our parents/grandparents do.
I wish we would adapt the more positive aspects of Western society and use it to enhance ourselves.
[...] Being an Arab has its moments Posted by admin on May 21, 2011 random I hope I mentioned this in earlier posts, but remember my bro was here last week? So was my aunt and cousin. However, I always wondered why my mom thinks the way she does. She has such an Arab… [...]
You shouldn’t call it a gap, the proper word is probably a black hole, and it’s not just an Arab problem i think. If we “people” learn to accept each other no matter what our cultures, background or religion, then and only then we will live in piece all together. And nothing is impossible. Good luck with you Arab culture critic (check out Ibn Khaldun) if you’re serious about it.
@Dena
I am stealing this:
“Mona you know what they say, you can take the Arab out of the Middle East but can’t take the Middle East out of the Arab.”
@project management
I wouldn’t call it black hole.. still a gap..
Great post Mona! It’s always interesting to get some insight into the REAL modern Arab.
You are very interesting sister!
thats pretty much what i can say 
and what are the ethics and morals of the Arabs? I am an Arab myself but very curious to know
may be u talked about that before? have a link?
Morals..ethics….these things don’t apply in tensed real situations…these are just part of the ‘social’ ‘friendly’ act…when it comes to push yourself out of the boundries and actually do something you can’t take them to seriously into consideration..u gotte stick to ‘the plan’..u leave traditions, family, everything if necesary….and u done that…that’s why u’re here blogging insted of being somewhere home with a husband and his other 4 wives..waitin for your turn. Morals and ethics…who cares about them when it comes to ones self?we only care about them till a point…after that we just make up excuses to go past them:))
I believe morals and ethics have nothing to do with family and traditions, or to be more specific lets say they are not the same thing.
They were just some examples…go and read again and get at me;)
Morals and ethics are the way we treat one another as a society. Friendliness, respect, putting others before us, etc. There are so many, and generally speaking, Arabs are known to have high morals and ethics. They are very well behaved and conservative culture because we are raised that way. There are always the odd few that don’t live or know or care about such things, but what can you do?
lool..I have arab blood but born in africa..lol but its the same thing..who is virgin and who isnt..it bugs me..lol..and since i came to america my dads email include the same thing…at the end of the email beware of boys..etc etc…
Your right mona. But in the end were all humans, and put in the right situation we eventually crack. And “what can we do?” What u did…your living proof:))