It’s peculiar
Hi guys,
It’s me again. I have been blah for a while, but I am back to my normal self, whatever normal is. I remember when I was taking psychology at University, and we learned statistics and the norm, and I was like you are kidden right? I am not normal according to some analysis of a selected group of people! How absurd! That’s when I realized as a 19 year old that I am not even close to be defined as one.
You see, most girls would want to get married, settle down, have children, but I have no idea why I don’t want to. It’s not that I don’t want to per say, but what’s the point? I lived 31 years and according to my backward culture, I am far too old and I could be a grandmother, literary. It’s ok! I just gave up with I realized, well, I am not that pretty. I do not have a wow ideal Arabic body. I am very outspoken, very opinionated and I don’t care what I say, because it needs to be said. Also, I don’t communicate with other people. I just go to work, come home and I don’t care to talk. I have 100′s of cell phone minutes that I don’t use at all.
I guess I never wanted to be labeled with that stereotype of a typical Arab and decided to seclude my self. I wonder if people even remember me or know who I am. Have you ever wondered if people still remember you? It’s like you are a walking dead person and people just think you are dead.
Oh what am I talking about. At times I wish I had my own home that I get to decorate my self. I wish I had a garden to plant herbs and flowers. I wish for many things, but I guess people like me are not meant to live the simple life and have to live their lives wondering and imagining things.
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“It’s ok! I just gave up with I realized, well, I am not that pretty. I do not have a wow ideal Arabic body. I am very outspoken, very opinionated and I don’t care what I say, because it needs to be said.”
Who says that doesn’t make you beautiful? Mona I remember from a few pictures that you posted in the past. Ummmmmmm… you’re not ugly at all
I think I can relate maybe? I don’t feel that I’m ugly, but I cannot compete with these barbie doll types. Whenver I see a hot girl I’m like…. “well fuck my life.” But alhamdulilah I’m healthy alhamdulilah that’s really all I can ask for. Yeah I went on a mini rant lol it gets to me, meh.
That sounds like the life btw, having your own house to decorate etc… Why don’t you travel and see things? Don’t you have any remaining best friends who stuck by you? Get together with them or something. Fuck em if they’re married lol they’re trapped in some sort of “freedom” they believe they have. Come on, you can do ANYTHING you want whereas they can do anything they want till their children wake up haha.
Believe me or not. I actually admire you for not being married etc and omg! you survived
Just make sure you have fun and do the things you want to do. Don’t look back at your life and feel bitter about it, please?
So move out and get your own studio apartment, consider it a an experiment in social science….Just saying.
Don’t give up on anything, Mona. If you want a change you need to step out of your comfort zone and go for it. 31 is not old.. make a change before you are 40 and thinking boy did I waste my youth. You deserve to have some happiness.
I have complete confidence that you will move in the right direction. It is good to be able to dream, but don’t let others tell you what to dream or if your dreams are not meant to be.
So what? Being normal is boring. If you were normal I wouldn’t be reading your blog.
Bollocks! You’re pretty, whether you like it or not.
You seriously need to get out and meet people, and that means non-Arabs too. Not that I have anything against Arabs, but if you’re going to live in a country were the majority of people aren’t Arab, it’s easier if you don’t restrict yourself to just Arab friends. Go out with colleagues at work, join a club, find a hobby, meet people at the gym, etc.
This is not our grandparents day. We live longer, eat better, live better, have better access to modern medicine. We don’t need to get married so young anymore, there’s a lot we need to do before we decide to settle down.