I was officially hired today!

“Mona, you need to seriously be more rebellious,” my mother said as we were arguing about my life while walking to the mall.

I heard that and thought, “Dear God! My mom used the magical word to encourage me!”

After many arguments about my life while going to the mall, walking inside the mall, having some coffee at the mall, she realized that I am not sitting and doing nothing all day. I make money from the Interweb.

Mom said, “how much money are you making, and doing what?”

With a wide grin I said, “I do little contracts here and there. I make enough money to pay my student loans and credit card every month. I pretty much have the same amount of money in the bank as I did after my last pay cheque few months again. It barely decreased.”

“You need to seriously start a business,” she said.

“MOM! That’s the plan, but everything takes time. I am telling you right now, I do not want to work for anyone. I don’t want to be stuck in an office and being ordered around. I like my freedom and to do whatever I want,” I argued back.

She said, “It is the only way to make money anymore. Finding work seems impossible these days. You should start a business, get office space somewhere, and start hiring people.”

I kept arguing, “Takes time. Takes time.”

While walking back home, I said, “You know, the internet is amazing. It is a world of opportunities. My plan is to write a book. Did you know that I took advanced writing courses in University? I just need a couple or so courses, and I would get a writing certificate.”

Mom replied, “So try to find a writing job, and why don’t you write this book about your life?”

I said, “Did you know there are people that make thousands of dollars online a month from having personal websites that just talk about their life?”

She frantically replied, “Then why don’t you have a website about your life! People would love to read it.”

Smiling and waiting for the final approval, “And I should put advertisements, and write a book while I am at it?”

Mom excitedly replied back, “Yes! Why not?”

Bingo! Got her!

“I do have a site online, and that’s how I make money, ” I replied back with a glow on my face.

“Good that you do and you are making money from writing and having your own websites!” she said.

I replied back, “I want to make money off the net, and start something big. I know how to write well, make websites, and I am not limited to anything!”

I guess now she feels a lot better towards me. I GOT A JOB! I WORK FROM HOME! I AM NOT A BUM! However, she doesn’t understand why I can’t find a guy and want to marry. Now that’s another story that does not need to be discussed at the moment.

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I got several of suggestions the past few days regarding my life. I feel that people who read my blog daily know me really well now. Their analysis of me is dead on correct, that I am starting to rethink some of the things that I write on my blog. I feel that if I met my regular readers in person, then I wouldn’t have to bother talking about my self, they would know it all. It’s kind of freaky and cool at the same time.

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One person that was overly concerned with my mental well being suggested that maybe I should use my blog to find “the one.” You want to know what method was suggested to do so? To do it like Paris Hilton’s My New BFF show. I was like what??? Hahaha.. However, I thought of it more like the show The Bachelorette. Seriously people, what the heck? You guys think I will find “the one” through this blog? Am I supposed to turn this site to The Arab Blogorette. Umm?

Should I kiss dating sites goodbye? No Arab community match making by old ladies that think they got the gift of doing so? No waiting day and night for my knight in charming armor under my window? Come on!! I was looking forward to all these ways with an end positive result!!

Yeahhhhh . . . rrrrrighhhhttttt . . .

Anyways, I doubt my blog is the place to find “him.” Why? Because most of the Arab guys that ever came across my blog hate it and me with a deep passion. They are the ones that love to send me hate mail from reading one of my old controversial posts. Also, I doubt that many Arab guys that are older than me would bother reading my site. Moreover, if that “one” is out there and reading this right now and being a total ass by not telling me, then he will get what he deserves later! I am just kidden! I just love to throw empty threats around.

Ahh.. anyone have any other ideas? Just out of curiosity.

Advice, Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Funny, They said what?, Whatever!

I have decided that I need to share again some random visitor’s keyword searches and phrases. They are all from those that arrive to my site thinking they will get the “answer.” I will give them some answers alright! I could turn this to a monthly endeavor. Why not? So, what do I have in store for people today that I can share, but remain a decent well dignified honourable blog that your mother will be proud to read!?

The following are copy pasted search phrases from search engines to my blog, and my reply right under:

1. “how do you know if he wants a serious relationship”
He would definitely not visit this blog to find that answer.

2. “when a guy wants to make you happy”
Cliche answer, “he won’t make you ever cry!” My answer, “he will treat you like his equal!”

3. “capricorn man says he misses you”
Being a Capricorn my self, you need to believe the guy. We don’t utter a word unless we damn mean it!

4. “rebellious feeling psychological problem”
I am not sure exactly what they were searching for, but I do have that feeling all the time of being rebellious. I am not sure of any psychological problems that go along with it. However, I am sure some grad student out there is figuring that out right now!

5. “what woman should know about arab men”
Don’t even get me started on that one!

6. “what is aquarius not compatible with”
Definitely not compatible with a Capricorn. Total opposites! Stay away from us!

7. “how do you know they are the one”
Well, ask your self this, “can I stand the way this person treats others?”

8. “why do arab men keep everything from women”
Cause they are ashamed of their past, and the crap that they do every day that they know is wrong.

9. “arab men dont know how to make love”
Wow.. no comment!

10. “what arab people say about having a relation before marriage”
They say, “OH NO!! THEY ARE TALKING TO ONE ANOTHER AND KNOW EACH OTHER! THEY ARE DOING IT TO GET TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER! SINFUL!!! SINFUL!!!!”

11. “too many people are getting rebellious”
I KNOW! Copy cats!

12. “how do i know what arabs look like”
Well, we are kinda human like, with a bit of similar facial features to the rest of the world.

13. “i hate capricorns”
Why? What did we ever do to you AQUARIUS, PISCES, SAGITTARIUS and GEMINIS!

14. “what is wrong with rebellious arab girl blog”
Wow.. I can name a few problems. 1. It is run by an Arab girl. 2. It has the word rebellious in it. 3. She is totally awesome!

15. “i wana get married how long it takes to fix the papers the guy is in canada”
So the guy is importing you from back home? Bitch!

16. “the truth about arab men”
The truth is that they are mighty damn fine looking. That’s why I want one!

17. “how do you deal with rebellious people?”
Tell them that they are awesome, and they may change their minds about holding a rebellion against you!

18. “weird arab traditions”
Almost every other one!

19. “how can one be in love with some one and the other not feel the same?”
Maybe the other person has no feelings? I don’t know. It happens all the time to so many couples.

20. “what it means if a guy is always hugging you”
He is needy and you are cuddly like a fuzzy haired huge bear.

21. “how to say bitch to a girl in arabic”
Who wants to volunteer and tell this person how to say it in Arabic? Cause I don’t feel like it.

22. “how to get a job when you dont have experience”
Dude.. I can’t get a job and I have 6 years experience.

23. “why do arab girls wear too much eyeliner”
Cause we like it and we can get away with it!

24.”jobs where you dont have to deal with people”
My current job!

25. “i have realized that i just dont like you”
Me neither. What a coincidence!

26. “why do companies say they will keep your resume on file”
So when you apply to another position at their company, they will ignore you.

27. “what is the best way to break it off with someone”
Do what I did, create an online blog for that purpose.

28. “i thought the world was either black or white”
And you found out that there is a bit of grey? Didn’t you used to colour when you were little and learned that there are different gradients to each colour?

29. “what color eyes look best on arab girls?”
The common one! Brown!! Jeez.

30. ‘why do arabs gossip so much”
Because it is like a breath of fresh air to them!

Advice, Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Funny, Idiots, They said what?, Whatever!

A lot of people ask me to share some tips on how to keep maintaining their online personal blog, drive lots of traffic, and keep people coming back.

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How to get a personal blog started

1. Choose an overall theme to your site. I know it is personal, but you have to have some type of focus point to your site. For example, I am known to write very direct and to the point posts. I don’t sugar coat anything, and I chose the idea of rebellious as a way to represent my ideas to the world. Quick and dirty, but to the point, because that’s who I am. So, ask your self these questions:
   1. What do I want to represent to the world? A reiteration of what happened in my daily life or journal of thoughts that lead to discussions about certain issues related to my daily life?
   2. What writing style should I follow? Should it be complex or simple?
   3. Who are my main target audience?
   4. Should I stay focused to one idea all the time, or be unpredictable every day and bring something new to my audience?
2. Should you start a blog from scratch? Scratch means the following:
   1. Buy your own domain name. I prefer this route, because you want your web presence to be unique online. It’s like your name. You are a unique person, so why not have a unique name online?
   2. Install a platform that you are already familiar with and practiced using. I have used Wordpress.org for a long time. Before I started this blog, I already knew how to use Wordpress and I have used it for other projects. My suggestion for those that are familiar with programming or web design, to test Wordpress first and play around with it before committing to it. If not, get someone else to do it for you.
   3. Choose an interface style or theme. I know many people have the hardest time with this, and would rather download a free Wordpress template, or buy cheap ones if they are deeply committed. However, if you spent the time buying a domain, buying hosting space every month, then why not spend a bit of time to customize your site? Make it personal. It has your name on it. You don’t want to dress like half the people out there, right?
   4. Spend time upgrading your site. There are many plugins out there that will enhance your site’s functionality.
3. Should I monetize my blog? I know many people want to make money online, especially with their blogs. It’s not that easy, and I don’t recommend you doing it from the get-go. You need to attract visitors first, and many of your visitors are not stupid. If they don’t know who you are, and they realized that your site is still new, and they see advertisements permeated all over the site, then they know you are not being sincere in your writing. You are no longer writing for your self and them, but to only make money off of them. I didn’t start putting advertisement on this blog till after 1.5 years maybe into it.

How to drive traffic and maintain a loyal audience

I know this is the hardest thing about maintaining a site. How to get audience? Is submitting your blog to search engines enough? Should commenting on several blogs just to get your name out there enough?

1. Write a lot of different things. Write anything, and everything possible. Don’t limit your self, or think that “someone” out there is watching. Everyone is watching. Stop this fear from writing and knowing people you know in person might be reading it. Who cares?
2. The more you write, the more search engines are attracted to you. Search engines’ bots love new content. The more you write on a daily bases, the more the bots will go through your site and index new content. The more differing thoughts you have, the more keywords it can pick up.
3. Join social networks.
   1. I use Entrecard on a daily bases, and it is the number one tool for me, as a personal blogger, to attract various audience, and to also see what is out there. The more you drop, limit 300 a day, the more exposure you have online to various people all over the world.
   2. I use Stumbleupon every now and then. I find it a great tool for others to help you advertise certain posts to certain categories.
   3. I use Facebook every day. I find it the most personal way to tell others, I will talk to you. I will be more personal with you, using PM, Wall posts, comments, etc. I am not just a person sitting behind a screen writing blog posts. I am like you, and I don’t mind being friends and getting to know you personally, and vice versa.
   4. I use Twitter all day long. It is the number one way to find me online, and quickly ask me a question. I try my best to answer as soon as I can. I try to write about what I am thinking, how I am feeling, and share some cool links I find online.
4. Get others to subscribe to your site. Everyone will tell you that you must have an RSS feed, and an email subscription link. I agree, however, what I really love is when people bookmark your site to their favorites, or know your link by heart. That’s when you know what you really attracted others and gained a loyal audience. You made your mark online, and people now know who you are.

How to make money from a personal blog

I honestly don’t have a definite answer. I make money because my website traffic is high, and I have great internet exposure from the several keywords or phrases from my blog posts. However, I had this site for over three years. In the beginning, I read a lot about making money online in the 1000’s of dollars, but I didn’t know how to take those tips and apply it to a personal blog. I found it to be a great challenge. So I decided to focus more on attracting people to come on a daily bases, and have fun with my blog instead. I stay interactive with my audience and show them that I am really just like them. If I end up making 1000’s of dollars from advertisements every month, then great. I know it is nearly impossible and I doubt I will ever, but we can only hope eh? Otherwise, I will do what I have always been doing, writing to tell a story about me, the world that I live in, and the way I perceive many issues in life. Then, things can keep developing from there, right?

And like the song says, “Que Sera Sera! Whatever will be, will be!”

Cheers!

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I should be the last person on earth to be asked this question, but people always message me asking, “what is your take on arranged marriages in Islam?”

All I can say, it still happens and it will never change. Do I agree with it? It all depends on your personality and the way you were raised. Not everyone follows it. The world changed so much, that parents or families in general don’t necessary force it at all. They prefer that their sons and daughters find their other half through a process of love. The reason such liberalism in thinking regarding such a sensitive topic in our modern times is more common, is due to the fact that the previous generation, or our parent’s generation, has suffered from these arranged marriages.

Life came to a point that it was rushing so fast. More women were educated, becoming more liberated, and are working and helping out with the family’s income. So, their “role” in the family changed drastically, but the mentality of the way many people perceive it till now has not. That’s how problems arise from these arranged marriages and the overall perception of it.

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Do I think Muslims ever marry out of love then if they go through the process of arranged marriages? Umm…

Many people, especially Muslims, till now believe arranged marriages are better. The groom and bride are forced to believe that love develops after marriage. It should never be before that. That’s fine. The way Muslims perceive it, love can easily fool someone’s emotions, and the devil will occupy those two people and cause them to commit sinful actions. Which is true, it happens a lot, and God does not forgive such actions. It is even a sin in other religions, not just Islam. But I believe that people who end up in such a position because they are very weak. They are weak in personality and faith. If all Muslims followed only the basics of their religion, then no one would have to worry about arranged marriages or forcing a girl to marry too young, or any other weird story that many people hear about every day. However, there is always evil in this world that messes up people’s judgments.

Do I believe in arranged marriages in general? Umm…

If we want to base this on the great method of keeping up with damn statistics, and personal experiences from you, yes you the reader, then, ah, I hear about breakups and divorces more than anything in our world. In Canada, the divorce rate is hovering around 38% yearly, and in the United States, around 45%. Isn’t that a bit too high? Seriously, if the majority of those people married out of love, spent so much money on a wedding, home, furniture, appliances, and even procreating, then why in the world did it end in divorce? Wasn’t it a marriage based on love? So what would be the odds that an arranged marriage is better or worse than that?

For arranged marriages, I don’t know what the statistics are, but I got many people telling me, the odds of marrying out of love or arranged marriage is almost the same, and most likely the same number of people will end up in divorce. Therefore, don’t think arranged marriages are such a bad thing. Like I said, you are asking me, Mona, if I think it is ok. I think marriage in general is not ok! I am anti-marriage and anti-love. Happy? No, I am just joking I swear, but many of you already know my take on this whole marriage business. It ain’t easy, and I am old enough to know that a person needs to control their emotions and think before signing their life away, and be part of someone else’s life. I like things to last forever, and I am not willing to jump into the band wagon because everyone else is. And I believe that resorting to an arranged marriage is like accepting vanilla over chocolate, and I damn love my chocolates!!

For the final time, marriage is different people. Arranged or out of love, married life is SO different. So, this question that people keep asking me, and thinking that it is so backwards and our religion is so oppressing for women, and life, etc, need to really stop. There is no right answer. It is all based on experience, and I experienced neither to really come up with a really really good answer. All I know that love is over rated. Life is a lot more than that, and we should never let our emotions take over logical life choices.

I keep hearing Syrians or even Lebanese saying this regarding marriage, “Marriage is like a watermelon. You don’t know how it tastes like till you open it. It could be sweet or sour. You never know.”

HOWEVER! I can sense the odd few anal people right now that will counter argue that phrase! They will say that you can pick the exact sweet type of watermelon. Science changed things. . . Blah blah blah .. spare me .. spare me this argument. It is pointless!

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