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I was looking at the crowd

June 23rd, 2009

I gave a heart breaking speech back in late 1982. I found old pictures from way back then. I know, funny how I find such poses of my self. :P

Old records from the media wrote that I commented on various issues such as the aftermath of the Lebanese-Israeli war, and the ongoing Lebanese Civil war. Why all the religious conflicts in the area? When will it ever end? Looking back now, as an 80’s child, I grew up hearing about middle east wars, and if there will ever be peace in the area. Haven’t we had enough? Over 25 years later, and the area is in more chaos than before and serious problems can ignite at anytime.

My little blog first female Arab leader elections is still on. ;) (Post 1, Post 2) Maybe you and I can make a difference, and let our children and children’s children live in a more peaceful world in this lifetime of ours.

Some people wanted to discuss politics, and I seldom get involved in such long debates. However, this post is an opportunity to discuss historical facts, modern facts, and current affairs in the area. I know the Iran Elections have caused a stir in the world, but the result of that election will effect the Arab world as well. So why not! Go ahead. I feel like debating.

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Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Random Thoughts, Religion, They said what?, Whatever!

I hope things changed just a tiny bit

June 21st, 2009

Over a year ago, I started a poll about my visitors. I no longer have the exact statistics, but I always find it fascinating about readers of this blog, and it helps me in my daily writings. When I did the poll last year, the way higher percentage as I recall correctly was non-Arab readers.


[source]

I have had many issues in the past regarding the Arab blogsphere. I am not welcomed in it, I am not allowed to join many Arab blog networks, and I am ridiculed with a passion from that selected niche. Since I am rebellious, a girl, and say a few things that they hate, the Arab visitor count to my blog is very low. However, there is an exception of those visitors that search for the forbidden Arab love and land here from Google. They just need their mother to work harder to find them a perfect pure teen Arab bride, and not waste their time finding a [fill in blank] Arab girl.

So, that was about a year ago. Now, I feel like I am regaining an Arab audience, I hope. Keeping my fingers crossed!

Another famous poll!

Are you?

View Results

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You can tell I have been spending my day reminiscing old blog posts. I seldom re-read my old posts, but I did today!

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Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Random Thoughts, They said what?, Whatever!

We are who we are

June 19th, 2009

I may not know many people in this city that I live in, especially Arabs. However, my mom knows many because of the nature of what she does. She fixes clothes for people, but 99% of those people are Arabs. It is the only thing she can do, and is more like a hobby and social interaction. She learned this hobby when she was only 15, because it was the only thing that she can spend her day doing. The people raised in a Palestinian refugee camp in Lebanon at its early days, most likely did not have many females getting a proper education. My mom was one of them.

She has been fixing clothes, or being a seamstress almost all her life. She gets to meet lots of Arabs as a result, and hear their stories. And most of you know my mother by now, she is Reuters in this house. I know many stories about Arabs in this city of mine, but never really interacted with them or cared to.

It’s all in the Culture

Last night, I was sitting on my L-Zay Boy couch. That’s where I have been spending all day with the laptop on my lap. I’m spending my day writing a fictional story, and I will soon post parts of it weekly on my blog. Stay tuned! It is just for fun, and something new. Anyways, my mom comes into my blog office, and sits on a chair. She tells me, “I know so many people now. You know this and that. I met her aunt today and 15 year old daughter. They wanted me to add an extension to a dress.”

I looked at my mother with a raised eyebrow and said, “Aha? And?”

My mother continued on, “The lady wanted me to add an extension to the top area of a dress, so her daughter’s breasts don’t show. I was a bit surprised, because I didn’t know that Christians cared about such dress issues.”

They were Iraqi Christians.

“Mom, so what if they are Christians? They are Arabs. In reality, it has nothing to do with being a Muslim only to dress conservatively. It is our culture that is conservative, and not religion,” I said with a concerned voice.

Mom replied, “I sensed that. The lady said that her husband will scream at her, and not their daughter for wearing an uncovered dress like that. It had to be fixed.”

I sensed mom’s concern and confusion. Typical Arab Muslim mentality. I said, “Mom, like I said, it has nothing to do with religion. Look at some Muslim Arabs that live here or back home. Look at the way they dress. It is shameful and an invitation for rape. So what Arabs wear has nothing to do with religion anymore. If they do care, it is following cultural conservative traditions. That’s if many know what those modest traditions still are.”

Enlightening Her with Some History


[Screen shot from Fadi Andrawos music video]

I was reading some history of Palestinian life before 1948 the other day, and I wanted to share some stories with my mother. I continued on the conversation and told her, “Before the war, many of the Palestinians lived in villages and were farmers, etc. They lived a very modest life. Their only worry in life was having daily necessities to survive. Since most of them were living such a life, many of those villages lacked mosques or churches, but everyone knew and respected each other’s religion.”

Mom interrupted me and said, “Of course. That’s true, and the neighbours celebrated each other’s religious holidays. Many Christians fasted in Ramadan like their Muslim neighbours. Muslims celebrated Christmas and Easter like their Christian neighbours. They never let religion separate them.”

I said, “Exactly. Palestinians lived the Arab life. They respected each other, and never made religion a barrier between them. They celebrated each other’s religious holidays. They mourned with them. They celebrated great times with them. I don’t know when this religious separation ideology between Arabs started, but it is not right. Especially Arabs here that come from some noratic closed minded Islamic lifestyle back home, and think anyone who is not a Muslim is the devil.”

Mom said, “You are right. Our religion says to respect those who carry the holy books. Christians and Jews.”

“Exactly!” I excitedly said. “So no more of this religious crap that shocks the hell out of Arab Muslims here. They need to look deeper into their religion. Also, they should learn the true essence of being an Arab,” I added firmly.

I think I lectured my mother enough yesterday. However, I know nothing will change. At least I said something, and not only to her my loyal readers. :)

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Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Palestine, Religion, They said what?, Whatever!

Searching for that long lost relative

June 17th, 2009

This morning, my mother came up to my blog-office (yes that is the name of it now), and she was all giddy. She excitedly said, “look up my last name on the internet. My cousin’s daughter, 28 like you, first name like her grandmother’s, has a picture online, and looks like YOU Mona!”


[source]

You may wonder why in the world my mother would be on the internet. You see, my household is your typical home. My mother has her own computer in the basement, my dad has a computer, and my sister has a computer. Each person has a computer! However, I have a kick ass desktop, a wickedly awesome laptop, cell phone with 3G internet networking, and an office! I am fully loaded eh?

So, my mom only knows two things:

1. Internet Explorer.
2. Yahoo.com

I know! So old school! But hey, better than nothing.

Us searching for that relative

I did what she wanted, and searched for her last name on Google. Both my mom’s family and my dad’s family are very Palestinian. Meaning, both their surnames are very well known to be found in certain regions. Therefore, we make an assumption that a person born with the same last name is related to us, and not many of us are online! I told her, “what link did you click on? A Facebook public profile?” She said, “no, what is this? Google? No, I didn’t use Google.” I then nodded my head and gave mom a dissatisfied look, and went to the address bar and typed Yahoo.com to use it for searching. She then looked at the search results, and she said, “That one!”

It was a Plurk profile, and I saw the picture. I angrily said, “mom! She looks nothing like me!” She said, “no no, she does!” I said, “NO! God! She looks like no one! I look like no one! Why do you insist? Because she is related to us?”

What happened this morning reminded me of another event that happened two or three years ago.

Them searching for us

One day, out of the blue, I got an email to my work address, because my about me work profile is online, from a guy with the same French spelling of my last name. Yes, there is a British spelling, (my current distant cousins living in Jordan spell it that way), and French spelling, or how Lebanese would spell it. However, the first name threw me off. The name was Elias, a biblical name. I thought I entered the Twilight Zone or something when I saw it. I got a cousin with a hardcore Biblical name? Interesting.

I read the email, and he thought I was his cousin Mona, the daughter of his uncle George, who fled from Australia, and is hiding somewhere in North America.

I know, totally bazaar!

I emailed back and told him, “you must be mistaken. I am not who you think I am. Are you Palestinian like me? My parents are born in Lebanon though, and I am Muslim.”

The dude had a serious problem with what I said. He emailed back saying, “How dare you deny your roots and religion! Our family is Lebanese and Maronite Christian. Why are you lying to me? Are my uncle and you afraid to be found?” Blah blah blah.

WOW! The confusion! After that day, we realized that our last name is shared by a Lebanese Christian family. Very interesting. :twisted:

Just remember, your last name may not be yours only!

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Our diaspora leads us to think of things much differently

June 13th, 2009

I have been listening to the news lately about elections taking place in various countries this month. I am not interested in politics, or who are the people running, or how much money they bribed the people to vote for them. What grabbed my attention is the people outside of their home lands, those that have been living abroad for many years, have been voting like crazy at their home countries foreign embassies.

I am going to generalize for a bit to a certain but obvious group of people that live abroad.

Most likely, you left your country voluntarily and have been living outside of it for so many years. Most likely you have a dual citizenship, and allowed to vote for a leader back home. So, you left to find a better life outside of your home country, or better education, or better work placements for financial stability, or the obvious, many of you left your country because of political unsettlement, civil wars, or for just a plain new experience.

What puzzles me, is that thousands of people living for all those years outside their home lands, stand in line for hours and hours to just vote for a new political leader in the country they have not been living in for ages, and most likely don’t want to live in again. The country that they decided to leave, decided to not go back with their knowledge and education, decided to not go back to help stimulate the economy by starting new business ventures to compete with other nations, and decided to not introduce the positive things they learned living abroad to enhance the life situation and thinking of their people.

Yet, those people want to vote for a new political leader for their home lands? Why? Are they doing it to just be part of something because they can? Are they doing it so their name is recorded as a person that voted? Seriously, why?

I question those things because I will never understand it. I suffer from a psychological problem and an ideology that I have been brain washed with growing up. I have this thing called diasporic discontent. I keep asking my self, why? Why us? So, why so many people doing that? They voluntarily left their country, but still want to be politically a part of it? Some of us didn’t voluntarily leave it. Some of us were born outside because we were forced to, and labeled as refugees. In Canada, we were labeled as Stateless. Stateless? How can I be stateless if my birth certificate says that my nationality is Palestinian, and my father and mother are Palestinian? But it is all politics!

If someone out there gives me the power to go vote, then I will think about it first. Will I feel good afterward? I have a very sentimental attachment to my home land. I find it an honour to brag about. However, telling me that I can vote for someone over there, but I have no intention of going back, seriously makes me a traitor to who I am. Obviously, if you ask any Palestinian out there, they would tell you they will sell everything no matter where they are in the world, if they are allowed to go back home and live in peace. Voting is not really an important factor, and kind of stupid to do it from far away. We rather just live there, go back, rebuild it, then just going to an embassy and casting a vote to someone that will not effect us directly.

So why bother to vote? Just go back if you care so much. Some of us are not so lucky to do that!

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Angry, Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Palestine, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, Whatever!

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