In the past, I have known and conversed with many Arabs that lived life a certain way, because a majority of them came at a young adult age, but changed completely after I have talked to them several years later. It’s quite amusing seeing someone again after many years, but it is horrible at times and makes you step back a bit and ask them, “Is this really you? Who are you?”

A few years back, I had a conversation with an Arab man, much older than me, that told me, “To fit into this society, you have to act like them, think like them, and must only converse with them all the time.” At the time, I didn’t know what he was talking about really, but it made sense I guess. I grew up not around Arabs, then in my late teens, I was surrounded again with Arabs. Therefore, the thoughts in my head were not stable. I was exploring life and the people around me. I was trying to understand where I was now, who I am, and how I should live.

Live. How to live?

Unfortunately, this Arab man didn’t really convince me, since he was extreme in his choices of fitting in, that he lost the values of being an Arab. He still talked to certain Arabs since he is still one, but he lost the meaning of being one. Very much lost it.

Fakeness is Obvious

I think I have a gift in spotting a fake person a mile away. I think life just kicks people in the ass so hard, that they think they are making the right decisions. I knew some very traditional Arabs. Also, they are very religious, and held exceptional morals. If you meet them, you would say to yourself, “Hello! We are in Canada, but good that you stay true to who you are. Even though you are a bit odd and incomprehensible to the rest of the people around you, but I still salute you for being you and holding on to your values.”

Few years pass …

Bam! Twilight zone. Hello! What the hell happened to those people? My goodness. Is it me, or have people purposely decided that acting so fake, living a scripted life, and forcefully fitting in by acting so pathetically out of place, is the only way to do it?

One person I conversed with a few months back told me that hanging out with Arabs is bad. You have to hang out with the people here, act like them, do everything that is written in the book.

What book is that exactly?

I think there is a network of Arabs that spread this mentality. You see, I have met many non-Arabs that come from very distinct and obvious ethnic backgrounds, that don’t think like that. They act like themselves. They live life the way they want it, and expect people to understand them and learn about them, and not the other way around. Why can’t Arabs do that? Why are they always trying to change who they are to “fit in?”

Why can’t people just act the way they like and are comfortable with, and inevitably force the people around them to learn more and understand. Why should I change for you? Isn’t it easier to just make you understand instead?

I think that is the problem with the hatred the western world has towards other ethnicity, especially Arabs. They don’t understand us. If you don’t understand something, because the other person is not allowing you to understand, then you will get frustrated and wonder what they are hiding.

What are those Arabs hiding?

We are hiding nothing really, but some of us don’t know where that middle ground us; that intersection point between cultures that keeps it balanced and understood.

If you are a non-Arab, do you know much about Arabs? Who we really are? What life we live? What our real traditions are? What our real morals and values are? I didn’t think so, but for those Arabs who are too ASHAMED of who they are, and start living a scripted life, will lose their themselves. You might as well change your name to Mike, Jeff, Sam, or Mo, because you lost it anyways. You might as well lose the rest of it.

Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, They said what?, Whatever!

I always get numerous comments and emails from people saying, “Oh you are so brave, I couldn’t have a blog or say the things you say.” I always read them and laugh. To be honest, I just find it funny, because when I write on this site, I don’t do it because I am brave. I just don’t care or worry about who reads it. Even though there are some people that I know in real life that read this blog, I got nothing to hide or be ashamed of. If you agree or disagree, what do I gain? When you insult me, then I get mad; otherwise, I am always open for debates.

Also, I get people asking me how I do it? How do I write this way? I don’t know. I guess the older you get, the more expressive you become about the things you dislike. In my case, I dislike a lot of things, because I live between cultures. It’s not easy to live your life in the middle, and you can’t live your life one way or the other, because people around you will not accept or ever understand why you are like this.

Finding a happy medium is hard. It is really hard, and it is something I struggle with all the time.

For example, I don’t talk about my self much at work. If someone asks, then I answer, but I have no reason to talk about anything personal. Since it is Christmas season, I just say, “Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.” I don’t find it wrong to say that, but I have met some Arabs/Muslims that won’t even say it. Fine, whatever, you are not going to go to hell if you wish another religion to enjoy their holidays. You live around them, and you work with them, then have some respect, or they won’t respect your beliefs.

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I wouldn’t call this brave, but the idea of finding a happy medium that will satisfy everyone and let you live a comfortable life is something you have to work harder at. Discussing it with others that live a similar life as you is even harder. It’s hard convincing people with a thought, but that is not the intention of my writing. I want you to think about the things that I write. Even if you disagree or agree the first time you read it, then it should make you end up thinking. It’s not nonsense that I write, but it is something real. Real is what sells. Remember that!

In conclusion, I love thought provoking ideas, and writing them out publicly for the entire world to see, and engaging in a debate about them is very satisfying. If you would like to classify this as brave, then I have more reason to continue on writing.

Culture, Random Thoughts, Religion, Thank you, They said what?, Whatever!

After the events of the year 2001, and the way the world portrayed us as Arabs, the psychological well being of Arabs have been affected dramatically. When something negative is said to a person who happens to be of Arab descent, then the first thing they say, “Oh, they know we are Arab, that’s why they treat us badly and hate us!”

In reality, when a non-Arab communicates with us, 99% of the time they have no clue where we are from. We are mistaken to be anyone else but Arab. And those from other cultures are mistaken as us. It all depends on what we wear really. Which is usually an Islamic attire, and not really an Arab related one. However, for those of us Arabs here that wear nothing that distinguishes as from the rest, then the likelihood of anyone figuring out our real ethnicity is slim to none.

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So, why do Arabs constantly blame everyone else?

Us Arabs like to justify everything. We have to have a reason of why someone treated us like crap, or not giving us the level of utter respect that we deserve. Something in our heads keeps telling us that we are better than everyone else, and we must be treated the best way possible. Unfortunately, when you live in such a multicultural land, you are just like everyone else. Unless you are some famous Hollywood actor walking in the streets, then most likely, no one gives two shits about you.

So why am I mentioning all this?

You see, my lovely mother that I adore dearly, is a big time social butterfly. She knows people. A lot of people. And 99% of those people are Arab. So she keeps telling me random shit about what they say. The moment I hear it, and her believing it, makes me want to scream. My mother thinks that Arabs in this city, especially the older generation, gets treated badly or not given the proper customer care in anything, because they are Arab.

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How did they know anyways they were Arab?

The moment she says that, I say, “Everyone treats everyone badly. You should see the customer service horror stories I read on the internet from “Non-Arabs!” Being an Arab has nothing to do with it. Why do you Arabs keep thinking that if the world doesn’t treat you well, then they are against you because you are an Arab!?”

Then my mom screams at me and tells me, “Aren’t you ARAB?”

When the conversation reaches that level, I just get up and leave. I don’t know why parents have to say that. We have no shame of being Arabs. Our generation has no shame with our identity and roots. We just disagree with a lot of things that you say and think. Things changed drastically. We are just like everyone else. If you believe you are different, walk the streets like you are an alien, then most likely you will unconsciously think that.

You define your roots. Your roots don’t define you.

Blah Blah, Confused, Culture, Featured, Random Thoughts, Religion, They said what?, Whatever!

We were in the car today going to the mall, and my mom was mentioning something about Eid gathering for kids somewhere in the city. So she asked my sister if she wanted to go, and my sister replied pretty agressively and said,

“No way! I don’t want to go where Arabs are!” Even though we have to explain to the masses, and her, that not all Muslims are Arabs, and not all Arabs are Muslim. But you know, no one will understand that, ever!

My mom said, “You are Arab! What’s wrong with us?”

My sister said, “The rest are weird and all they do is talk, talk, and won’t stop talking!”

I looked at my sister, and I rolled my eyes the other way, then tilted my head toward the window and thought, “I didn’t do it. I swear! I had no influence over her. I can’t control that teen. No one can! She came up with that conclusion all by her self!”

My sister is a mini-me version of me!

I wouldn’t go to that extreme for not being around Arabs my age, but seriously, they do talk a lot, gossip, and stare menacingly at each other.

Blah Blah, Culture, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, They said what?, Whatever!

Tomorrow is Eid El-Adha! Yaaay! So Eid Mubarak to all my Muslim broz and sistas! Keep it real to the big guy up there!

Also, Happy Thanksgiving to my biggest website watchers and lovely peeps, the Americanos!

Finally, happy international Rebellious Arab Girl Day. In reality, it should be every day, but I don’t want to seem too greedy here. I am gonna call up Hallmark so they can consider it, and add it to their never ending list of celebrations that they have.

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Oh, for those that are wondering what Rebellious Arab Girl Day is going to be about, then I will make it plain and simple:

Rebellious Arab Girl Day,

The day of honesty,

The day of truth,

The day when you go up to that shit head person that has been pissing off, and tell them that they are wrong and they suck!

Isn’t that a lovely celebration?

Blah Blah, Culture, Happy, Religion