link: (http://www.levantinecenter.org/arts/artists/hybrids-new-exhibit-work-khalid-hussein-noah-haytin-0)

HYBRIDS is a dynamic new exhibition featuring two younger multimedia artists—Khalid Hussein and Noah Haytin—whose work explores power, identity and American and Middle Eastern ideologies. Both Hussein and Haytin express their creativity in strong colors and layered textures. What if Francis Bacon were an Arab? Or Chagall a Moroccan? HYBRIDS will open at the Inside/Outside Gallery (Levantine Cultural Center), 6-10 pm, 5998 W. Pico Blvd., Los Angeles CA 90035, on January 28th, 2011. The two-man show runs through February 28, 2011.

I can’t believe it folks, but seriously,

1. 30 years and still kicking old school style! (my birthday)

2. 5 years and blabbering online and liking it. (blog birthday)

What have I learned?

Well, a lot of people have asked me over the blogging years what I have gained from all this. Well, simple. I gained nothing but a headache. However, you all know me, I like the attention and the insults. It just shows how badly the internet is infested with morons who like to throw their crap around. They really leave a bad smell and make me appear like an angel with flaming wings! (hungry?)

Ok ok!! Enough of being oh so negative! Today rocks, and you all know it. My blog has survived many hurdles. A lot of people told me to just ignore it. I did not do that in the beginning life of my blog on Dec 23, 2005. It was just a normal blog, talking about normal things. However, as days passed, a lot more people around me started pissing me off. They hated what I wrote on here, and I saw the true side of some people. That’s fine, and my true side was never hidden. I just elaborated it more on this blog with Arabic eloquence and grace.

Finally, all I can really say after my messed up post thus far is the following:

I thank every single one of you for reading my blog and joining the conversation. Over the years I tried many methods or different ideas to add to this blog. However, what I found that straight up one to many conversations are a lot better. (computer talk here!)

Thank you all. The haters. The lovers. Old friends who may or may not read this blog anymore. All of you, thank you. It’s the least that I can say to everyone.

P.S. If I win the lottery on Friday, I am turning this blog to a happy zone; otherwise, you are stuck with little old blabbering me!

It’s funny how our personality changes as we grow older. My personality has changed completely by 180° the past couple of years. I think it has to do with having a job that I am not fond of very much. And having a very boring life that I am not making anymore exciting by the constant complaints.

However, I am fond of one thing though, and it is the ability to make my own decisions and live my life as I please. I think it has to do more with my bad temper and stubbornness to get what I want. I think of various solutions, and I pick the one that I am comfortable with the most. That could either be work wise, friend wise, or life wise. I pick and choose because I have to live with it. No one else!

The one thing that I am not fond about really is love. I don’t think I can put my self in those shoes again. I tried several times. I met and talked to many men that I can potentially have a future with. However, something was always lacking. Maybe it is the acceptance of the way the other thinks. Or maybe it is what they know about life in general.

I found out that many of those guys are very closed in their own worlds. I don’t know why. I have been trying to decipher the code but to no avail.

Or maybe I keep talking to the wrong guys and I can never find this ONE guy. I might as well stop trying. At my age I rather be alone anyways. I work for my self. I do not have to hear nagging or thinking they are uncle Arab and keep pointing out something wrong every two minutes.

Blah..

In reality, when a non-Arab communicates with us, 99% of the time they have no clue where we are from. We are mistaken to be anyone else but Arab. And those from other cultures are mistaken as us. It all depends on what we wear really. Which is usually an Islamic attire, and not really an Arab related one. However, for those of us Arabs here that wear nothing that distinguishes as from the rest, then the likelihood of anyone figuring out our real ethnicity is slim to none.

[Photo Source]

So, why do Arabs constantly blame everyone else?

Us Arabs like to justify everything. We have to have a reason of why someone treated us like crap, or not giving us the level of utter respect that we deserve. Something in our heads keeps telling us that we are better than everyone else, and we must be treated the best way possible. Unfortunately, when you live in such a multicultural land, you are just like everyone else. Unless you are some famous Hollywood actor walking in the streets, then most likely, no one gives two shits about you.

So why am I mentioning all this?

You see, my lovely mother that I adore dearly, is a big time social butterfly. She knows people. A lot of people. And 99% of those people are Arab. So she keeps telling me random shit about what they say. The moment I hear it, and her believing it, makes me want to scream. My mother thinks that Arabs in this city, especially the older generation, gets treated badly or not given the proper customer care in anything, because they are Arab.

[Photo Source]

How did they know anyways they were Arab?

The moment she says that, I say, “Everyone treats everyone badly. You should see the customer service horror stories I read on the internet from “Non-Arabs!” Being an Arab has nothing to do with it. Why do you Arabs keep thinking that if the world doesn’t treat you well, then they are against you because you are an Arab!?”

Then my mom screams at me and tells me, “Aren’t you ARAB?”

When the conversation reaches that level, I just get up and leave. I don’t know why parents have to say that. We have no shame of being Arabs. Our generation has no shame with our identity and roots. We just disagree with a lot of things that you say and think. Things changed drastically. We are just like everyone else. If you believe you are different, walk the streets like you are an alien, then most likely you will unconsciously think that.

You define your roots. Your roots don’t define you.

Having a steady friendship with anyone is a big time chore now a days. I don’t know why either! I feel that I have to sacrifice who I am, or change my personality to adjust to theirs. It’s like I need to do something on my part to satisfy them and keep them in touch with me on a regular basis. If I don’t do something, they won’t do anything on their end either.

[Photo Source]

The problem with me I am a giver. I like to give, but I hardly ever ask for anything in return. I don’t mean it in a material sense, but like saying hello, how you are, and that’s it. I don’t ask for anything. I just believe that all the friendships I ever had were based on using me. I am only remembered by people when they need something.

I think that is another main reason why I kept this blog alive. On a daily basis, I feel that I am alone. I am always alone, and I can’t seem to find people to accept me for who I am or even remember me. So I made this blog to see if someone out there cares. Do people out there care to read my thoughts and see what I am thinking? Do they want to talk to me and get to know me for who I am? Are my thoughts messed up and I am the one with problems, or I just can’t understand people?

I don’t need to change who I am on the internet for people to accept me. That’s why I keep this up.

However, why do I need to in real life? I think I just met all the wrong people in my life, or maybe I accept everyone for who they are, but not everyone is like me. That’s the problem, not everyone is like me, and I cannot find many people who will understand people like me.

If I had to analyze my personality in depth, I would say that I am too honest, very accepting of others, very reserved, and likes to give and not take.

Unfortunately, analyzing myself is not going to help me in life. All I can do is learn about others, grow as a person from meeting so many different people with eccentric personalities, and live my life knowing that there are people out there that maybe like me for who I am. I have not met them yet, but I am hopeful. And maybe they want to actually be friends with me, and not expect me to do everything their way, only think their way, and to have the same exact interests as them.

We are all different, but some of us are rare individuals that need a bit more understanding of why we think and do the things we do.

I got many people wondering why Arabs don’t like being friends with non-Arabs. It’s like us Arabs are known to be in a totally different world by our selves, but are we doing it on purpose, or “others” don’t understand us, so they don’t want to be friends with us?

[source picture one] [source picture two]

Therefore, would you accept us for who we are regardless of our conservative culture, religion, skin color, political problems, and fabricated stereotypes?

For those who are still wondering and never read the About Me page to know, I am a Computer Science graduate, and I am a programmer! I code stuff. Complicated stuff. Stuff that makes your experience using an application much easier. I make things user friendly. Aren’t I nice? I demand a cookie for being a girly-girly selfless geek!

Anyways, this constant thinking at work makes me extremely tired every day, and has been hindering my blogging time! I am so behind, and I don’t want to disappoint anyone with my lack of daily updates. I am going to start using those to-do task tool thingies that some other geek fellows created, and start being an organized Rebellious Arab Girl.

[source]

Understanding my Culture

I have gotten some great e-mails the past couple of days from people asking very good questions that I never addressed. So, what if you are a non-Arab and want to get acquainted with the Arab culture? How do you go about doing that? What do you need to know?

First off, let me introduce you to an Arab. Let me find one first! Wait, that’s me!!

1. I am 100% Arab. I speak Arabic. I was raised by an Arab family, and brought up in a conservative culture.

There is the magic word, conservative.

2. Not all Arabs are Muslims. Only around 80% – 85% of Arabic speaking people are Muslims. The rest are Christians, Jews, or other. Although different religions, but same culture and attitude towards life and family.

3. Arabs are very family oriented. They respect their family a lot, even distant cousins that they barely know.

4. Arabs have utter respect to their elders. Even if someone is a year older, they give them all the respect they deserve.

5. Arabs love to brag about their kids or anyone in their family that has excelled in “anything.”

Don’t think that I am using the word “anything” loosely here. I mean it, anything!

6. Arabs come in all shades of human skin color. The reason for that because the Arab world was under various European and Turkish rule. Also, the Arab world extends two continents with different climates. However, the original Arabs have a dark shade of olive skin or tan and dark eyes.

7. Not all Arabs wear turbans and live in tents in the desert. Who ever still does that are nomads living in the Arabian desert or other desert areas in the Arab world. The modern Arab world has malls and air conditioning, and even pizza delivery!

8. Arabs love their food! Oh the good tasty food! If you don’t feed us a good filling meal, we will mock you to eternity! So start learning to cook now! Hehehe!

Those are some of the positives I think that portray us Arabs as a great civilization. There are obviously a lot more that maybe my daily readers can point out in more detail in the comments area. However, point 3 and 4 above are the most important ones. That’s what makes our civilization so great!

Mona, why don’t you just marry a non-Arab?

What’s wrong with marrying a convert?

Mona, if you don’t like the Arabic culture, why not just marry outside of it and spare us your complaints?

Blah blah blah!

My answer is simple. I was raised a certain way, and I don’t want someone to get accustomed to the way I was brainwashed by the family and arabic culture, and I don’t have to get accustomed to his. However it is my choice, and I never looked down upon Arabs that marry outside of their culture. That is their choice and they have their reasoning to do so. I have no reason to judge, and no one should. I actually understand why they do that most of the time.

Why deal with the Arab in-laws that won’t leave you alone?

Why deal with messed up Arab customs that have no basis or reasoning?

Why deal with Arab backwards ideologies?

Those are just questions, and everyone has an answer to them. Many Arabs marry non-Arabs. It is known throughout history. A lot of people are against it, and I don’t know why. If it effects you directly, then go ahead and be angry about it. All I know is, that each person is held responsible for their own actions. Let them do what they please. Arab male or female, let them be.

I know there are so many problems with interracial marriages, especially the way Arabs perceive it, but what can you do? Arabs are so picky sometimes that they want their sons and daughters to only marry an Arab. However, this Arab has to be from the same country, speaks the same dialect, and is from the same village. What can you do? This is their mentality. Accept it, or leave it.

For me, I don’t have a problem with the interracial marriage thing, which I know why it happens. My problem is Arabs themselves who need to learn to accept each other first as Arabic speaking people. I used to get ridiculed for my messed up Arabic dialect by “other” Arabs who happen to be from the same old country as me. However, I am from a different region, but to them, I am from a different world. Therefore, this mentality is a reason that many Arabs (not me) resort to this solution of getting out of the whole Arabic messed up ideology, and just marry someone who doesn’t even speak the language and end it there.

Would I do it? Probably not. I like my language, and I like being an Arab. However, I am not rushing or ever thinking of this issue. I know there are so many problems in this culture of mine that make me want to abolish my roots, but seriously, it’s not so bad being an Arab. However, I believe that it is logical for an Arab to marry another Arab. If some Arabs think negatively of it, then maybe one day they will see the upside of the whole thing. If those Arabs really want things to change, then maybe they can start by the way they want to live their life, and raise their children in a more modern Arab lifestyle.

You change, things will change, and maybe you might be a little bit happier as a result. Right?

Not every Arab story is similar to Romeo and Juliette’s, where instead of the suicide, the result is the denial of your entire Arab roots. Let’s avoid that, and think of a way to change the messed up ideologies first, eh?

A few weeks ago, when I learned that my cousins turned Christian, I was a bit dumbfounded. It is disappointing; however, it would have been worse if they completely lacked the faith of a higher power. At least they still believe in God, right?

In general, this lack of faith has a lot to do with where they are currently living, or what they are exposed to. Also, more and more Muslims are reading too much into their religion, and see how others are slowly destroying the image of it. Western media is trying to destroy it slowly. Muslims are lacking faith and don’t want to live this life, and are turning into a complete and opposite direction. I feel like we are back over 1400 years ago at the time of Jahiliyyah. I thought we ended this era. However, it doesn’t seem to be the case at all in such an exposed technology driven world.

[source]

I am not a Muslim scholar, or have the right to preach about any religion. All I know is that we are all raised a certain way. However, we all grow up to chose what is best for us. Some of us seem to lack faith, effected by media, or just read too much into a very simplistic religion. Why can’t people learn the basics of a religion? If everyone does that, no one would use religion in violent manners, to oppress others, or to manipulate other’s thoughts.

Also, what’s up with Muslims that say they are Muslims, but don’t follow the religion at all? What does it matter what others think of you religiously, if you don’t follow it or care enough to learn about it?

NOTE! Please, if you want to reply to this post, avoid talking about science, evolution, or the story of Adam & Eve. I don’t have time for never ending debates, and stick to the point of this article. Muslims that turned Atheists, or people who lack faith in their religion. Thank you.

Many of you know about Sunnis and Shi’ite, the two main denominations in Islam. Well, as a Palestinian, it is very rare to find a Shi’ite Muslim. It is almost non-existent unless they are originally from Lebanon or Syria. Well, my grandmother was Shi’ite of Lebanese origin but born in Palestine. So that makes my dad half Sunni, half Shi’ite. Which makes me have many Lebanese Shi’ite cousins.

Ask me if I grew up caring about such a thing? The answer is no. To me, Islam is Islam. People just make a big deal about little past events, and give them selves new names with new religious traditions.

Unfortunately, many people make a big deal about denominations. It’s like Catholic and Orthodox Christians. Different customs and beliefs in minor things.

One time I was at an engagement party, and a Palestinian girl that I knew made such a big deal that our Sunni Syrian friend was getting engaged to a Shi’ite Lebanese. She treated it like the girl was committing a sin or something. I didn’t want to argue with her or start a never ending debate. I never tell people that I am 1/4 Shi’ite and it doesn’t bother me or I even care about denominations, because I know people’s reactions towards such a thing.

In the end of the day, I don’t care, and such segregations are the reasons for wars, hatred, and prejudice within a religion.

I wonder how children brought up with parents of different religions turn out? Hmm??