Today I decided to just reflect back at my life and list my regrets. Things I continually wish I can go back and change. It is usually a situation that I hated being in and I completely regret with all my heart.

So I have a list of things. Some may not be too regretful but I wish I can go back and change it.

1. I wish I never had to follow my parent’s rules to the point of loosing my sanity!

2. I wish I listened to my brother and not communicate with Arabs in University. Biggest and most depressing time in my life.

3.�? Never studied computer science.

4. I should have just majored in Biology with minor Spanish for fun like I was and could have been doing my PHd now and helping out poor sick people with my amazing research!

5. I should have never had this mentality that being alone was a bad thing and wanting someone to like me so bad.

6. Yes, I wish I never met him and not have to go through the worst years in my life loving someone who didn’t love me back at all and making me feel like I was nothing.

7. I wish I never had to give money to anyone and see if people actually appreciated me for me and not my money.

8. Having started my career too early without having a real path in life.

9. I wish I never flipped at people when I got pissed off. They might have deserved it, but I had more victims than anything!

10. I wish at times that I had more guts to approach people and discuss a problem and not just ignore them. (I still do that till this day).

11. I wish I was never intimated by other girls and just accept my self the way I am.

12. I wish I had close friends that I knew how to keep that actually accepted me for who I am and not just leave me and turn their backs on me.

13. I sometimes regret being stuck at my job for so many years, but there is something weird that keeps me there. I still don’t know what it is.

14. Sometimes I wish that I kept my mouth shut at work and just stayed the way I was. A quiet non-talkative person that actually got work done without arguing.

15. I wish I never used my blog as a place to bitch about life. I wish I had more of a theme or a more positive writing style.

16. I wish sometimes I didn’t have a blog, but I needed a hobby and something to keep me busy and vent instead of paying 100 dollars an hour for a shrink!

Random Thoughts

Well.. today was an interesting day. I got in trouble this morning from my boss because I am moody and sick of working on the same thing over and over. I just got sick of it! I feel like I am making something for non appreciative people. I swear. If they decide out of no where that they don’t like it, they will just decide, oh we are willing to pay 10,000 dollars for a stupid redesign from an external company and would rather treat me like crap.. I just can’t believe I flipped on my boss. I always feel like he is the middle man who has to suffer from crazy women. I am the craziest of them all! I think I am the worst person to deal with because I am so stubborn and so moody! I also think I have serious frustrations and I feel like putting it out on somebody. My boss was the victim. Sorry! ……. but… (Standing ovation to me).. I mean (cut my head off now!) .. :lol: I am so bad.. one day my attitude will seriously get me fired when my boss comes to his senses and realizes I am a nut case! (Maybe he thinks that now.. ) I know that for sure. :lol:

He also said I am a bad communicator. Me? :lol: .. hell ya! I agree. I will not deny that. I suck at talking.. but I don’t like whining either, so I don’t talk! That’s why I have a blog.. (The main reason!)..cause I friggen will flip on people because I have this mental problem thinking that people around me are not like me! I like things done a certain way and for a reason. I love to ask why, how, when, done! That’s my philosophy. I am a doer! I like things to have an aim and purpose and to get it done! I don’t like to flip flop.. boo.. it’s the worse thing for me to deal with!

Anyways.. so today I went to my first Jazzercise class. I dragged my sister too. Although she was way better than me! The class was great. I felt like I was awaken from my lazy ass sitting on the chair all day job and forcing my self to dance! We did Salsa, cha cha, tango, crazy aerobics! How do I feel now? Well I was dying. Literally, I felt like I was going to faint, but I was like dammit! My stupid little brat of a sister will not beat my lazy ass!! I will show her that my ass is not lazy but sleepy and needs to be awaken.

Funny, Random Thoughts, Sleepy Post, They said what?

As my mom says.. I am loud! Even my sister thinks I am loud. So I told them I am half deaf in my right ear and I cannot hear anything! So we ended that discussion real quick cause in reality, I cannot hear well!! So I am loud.. I’m loud.. you know it!

Anyways.. also today I decided to join Jazzercise! It’s not a gym, but more of a aerobics, yoga classes, and kick boxing. Stuff I can really use to beat up people. I am out of shape (big time), and I need to get back my adrenaline and go back to my old self. Soon I will look for a Tak-Wan-Do or Karate class. I have so much anger in me that I need to get it out but beating up people! I can’t wait!!

Tomorrow is the first class I will be going to. I will die. I will keep dying for a week or two.. but after that.. I will beat YOU up! muwahahaha!

Funny, Random Thoughts

Today I decided that I don’t want to be a member of Facebook anymore. I got bored and tired of people trying to add me to their list that I don’t know. I got tired of people messaging me that I don’t know. I just got tired of having a list of people just as a number. I don’t really talk to anyone. I could care less. If I wanted to talk to people I would use a messenger or face to face. I just got bored.

I lost interest. It is no longer amusing to me. It was, but I get bored easily.

I rather stick to my blog writing and reading. Looking at other people’s profiles is not interesting anymore. Just plain boring.

Random Thoughts, Whatever!

I spent my morning searching looking for other blogs. Someone out there must be an interesting person. I would say a majority of bloggers I found are moms in their mid-30’s. I thought that was interesting. They are great writers by the way. I was just not interested in reading about their kids and what they did that day. So I then searched for bloggers who have a little bit more spark. Something that gives them a type of uniqueness about their writing. Finding them was a bit hard. I would have to be doing this as a full time weekend job to find more interesting bloggers. Hmm.. I need to do more searching. Anyone out there know a few? I am not really focusing on Arabic blogs. I just want blogs that are worth reading!

Random Thoughts