I always wondered how one portrays their confidence without being called arrogant. I am not sure where to even begin. If one has any form of over confidence, they label them as arrogant. So if one is arrogant, would people would think they are confident?

What do you think? Have you ever been labeled arrogant but all you really meant to be at that situation just a bit over confident. It is more of a protective and stubborn state of mind, nothing more.

And the final question! Do you guys really think I am arrogant or just confident enough to seem that I am arrogant?

Blah Blah, Confused, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, Whatever!

I feel like dancing.

So I listen to old tunes, shake my head, and groove to the music. I guess music always makes me feel better about my self. It shouldn’t, but no one else makes me feel better about my self so I got to resort to something.

What am I saying? Maybe I am high on hot chocolate. I am just sipping it while contemplating the words to spit out in this blog post. Sugarlicious drinks always bring me some type of inspiration and a few caloric intake. But you know what? Who gives a shit! We live only once, and if it is a short or long life, hot chocolate won’t kill me, but will only make me more fun.

Fun. What a crazy word that is. I don’t even remember the last time I had fun. I think I am just too serious. I am a very serious person and I need to step it down a bit and have some fun in life. Like going out somewhere, like out of the house for instance. That’s always fun! But I am trying to achieve something more important because I am an intellectual person.

Me. Intellectual? No I don’t think so. I never was or ever will be. However, I am a bit too smart for my liking and way over analyzing. I blame computer science. Female. Computer Science. Programmer. Such a wrong combination. I am not smart because I studied that crap. I was just smart enough to make use of it for my own desires. The desire of being the one creating something and not just being the end user.

It’s funny that I mentioned end user. We are all end users. We are using the internet to bring us all together and in the end of it all, there is us. Us. We. You and I and them. We are all brought together in this virtual medium and it only seems that we may never come together and have some fun at a party that I will be hosting.

Can you imagine me hosting a party? It’s like asking Charlie Sheen to shut up. Never will happen! However, the sound of it is awesome and we should do it one day. So you guys organize it and get it all sorted out. It’s not that I don’t have money or anything to make it a really awesome party. Remember I am smart and I create stuff and people like me actually can afford to do stuff in life. But I, like 95.5% of the world who suffer from some form of attention deficit, I cannot plan shit. So one of you anal people out there who love to be super organized and want everything oh so perfect should do it.

Invite me. Don’t forget! I came up with the idea!

What am I saying. The chocolate is wearing off. Fuck this shit. I just need to relax and get the point.

I am sick of men. How about that? Sorry for 50% of the world, but fuck it. Men piss me off. Through out half my life, I couldn’t for the life of me find a normal guy who doesn’t lie, who is honest, sweet, truthful, fun to talk to, smart, good to others and just wants to live a simple life. I just give up. I am 30 and I give up.

Fuck it.

Angry, Blah Blah, Ranting as usual!, They said what?, Whatever!

I always wondered what my ultimate wish would be, and I know for sure it is not world peace. Because you and I know that peace is out of the question and the world will and always be in chaos. So forget about that, this is no beauty pageant.

So, maybe it is not wishes that I want or even dream of. I think it is more of small little gratifications that I seek. Like peace of mind, living a simple and quiet life, and doing things that I love to do on a daily basis. But, if I had all that, wouldn’t I still feel like I need something or I really have to have something in order for my life to have more meaning?

Maybe I am thinking too much here. But I need to write stuff out more often. The past year I have been bottling up emotions and I feel like I am 20 years old and afraid to talk. And why am I afraid to talk? This is a blog and I don’t know why I am holding back those emotions, from like the WHOLE world!

I am not afraid to talk anymore, but at the same time, is talking too much a good thing?

Oh well, at least I feel better that I said what I had to say and really, why am I afraid of?

Nothing.

Advice, Blah Blah, Random Thoughts, Whatever!

Sometimes I feel so low and so depressed, but something about having this site that I can’t resist. It’s like an infectious disease and it will just not go away that easily! You know what it is?

If you are really smart and you have been reading my blog for a long time then you would know what I am talking about.

This is what I love:

Your Name: sarmad
Email: xxxxxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.com
Website: http://

Message:
hi ,,,,,,,,,,,,,i want to chat some girl ,,,,,,,,,,but only arab….

You guys keep me alive and wanting to love life day by day, night by night, and year by year. Oh spammers, you put a smile on my face and you keep the web alive!!

Now I feel like singing a song!! The words are just vomiting out uncontrollably as a result of a bad internet hangover!

Rebellious Arab Girl Song:

chorus
I love spam.
I love spam.
Oooh baby.. I love spaaam!!

Yaaaaaa!!

chorus repeat

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!

I made this blog long ago
To capture all you spammer’s galore
You always put a smile on my face
When life is sinking me down the hole

chorus repeat

You make me say crazy things
That I would never do or think about
But you guys are the reason for my change
And wanting to always knock you out

I always love my crazy blog days
That have no premise or a plot
You make me want to vomit words
That are nothing other than crap

repeat chorus

Yes, you spammers are the best
Oh baby, just the best
But I will always detest your presence
Because you are nothing but nasty pests!

And yes, I would sing this stupid song better than Rebecca Black’s Friday! I would have more emotions, charisma, dramatic facial expressions, and not look like a dumb ass teen!

Blah Blah, My taste of Music, Random Thoughts, Ranting as usual!, Thank you, They said what?, Whatever!

The other day I was being a curious individual, searching Google looking for other perspectives of the issue of unmarried girls over 30, especially in Islam and the Arab culture. I was curious to know what others have said and what they are thinking. I was also curious to know if it mattered or it is a sin to choose not to, or is it only a sin in eyes of a culture and just looked down upon.

I wanted to know if it is something that we did wrong or is society thinking we are wrong. Because I don’t like to define wrong unless I tried what is right first or vice versa.

So I read several girl’s blogs complaining that people think they only care about their careers or education and think they don’t need a man. Or they look down on men that don’t think their intelligence is important in a marriage, and that’s why they hold on to it and think it is more important than anything else.

I have to disagree with that whole thought process because I was a victim of such accusations, but I never understood the reasoning behind it. When random men email me accusing me of the same thing, then I pause to reflect on such a thought. Do I care more about my career than meeting a guy?

• I knew girls that cared about getting married than anything else in the world.
• I knew girls that are intelligent but cared more about school and work than marriage.
• I knew girls that found equality between both marriage and career but suffered later by neglecting their children.
• I knew girls that got educated, got married and forgot that they are smart enough to be someone and contribute to society in some way.

However, I never met someone that didn’t care about work or a career and are only in it because they don’t know what else to do, and just dream that some day things will just get better.

Some of us girls, no matter how smart we are and educated, don’t really think that life is that great or work is that amazing or we are doing something astonishing. We are just waiting and trying to make the best of something we have and keeps us busy. How long, why, and how we ended up this way is really pointless to discuss.

I just feel this shame that our society puts on unmarried girls is psychologically deteriorating a large and very growing percentage unwed females. I wish society didn’t contribute anymore harm and just let life take its course. It’s hard changing society I know, but no harm in trying.

Blah Blah, Culture, Depressed, Random Thoughts, They said what?, Whatever!