When you got nothing to do, and you don’t want to do anything anyways, because life sucks and you are soaking in your seat waiting for a miracle from God, then you don’t need someone breathing down your neck AT ALL!

[source]

I have tried really hard to ignore people so they would stop bugging me. However, I can’t escape from the MOTHER! My Lord, I don’t understand why I have to keep putting up with her. I swear, at this rate, I am glad I am not married or being a mother. My kids will HATE me. They will seriously hate my guts if I acted like a typical Arabic mother, like my mother. I swear, it is a curse, I will end up like her. Everything rubs off. Like mother like daughter they say. Yet, maybe I have this little ounce of consideration and understanding of people’s lives that will make me just a tad bit different than her!

I don’t talk. If I was able to talk, I would explode right now. I would have so much shit to say to both my parents, that I would seriously forget how to speak Arabic, and start ranting in English like I do on my site. I wish at times I can just tell them exactly how I feel and tell them it is ALL YOUR FAULT! Leave me be miserable in my own little world that was a result of YOU! However, no. I can’t do that. I was born with this little guilt like life, raised to respect my elders, not talk about anything that will piss them off, and keep suffering from the inside.

THAT IS NO REASON TO KEEP KILLING ME!

I was watching The Rachel Ray show this afternoon, and I was laying down on my Lay-Z boy chair. The thing is amazing. Probably the best thing anyone can ever give me. I want my great great 1000 years from now grand-kids to inherit this thing. So, I was just laying on it and watching TV, because I got nothing else to do with my life. I have no energy or care anymore to do anything with my life. What’s the point? Work, put money in the bank, and look at it. Is that a life? No. So I will stick to laying down and doing nothing.

So, she comes to the door of my little office and tells me this:

Mother: “Is this your life now? Just laying down and watching TV?”

Me: “Yes. What do you want me to do now?”

Mother: “Don’t sit, do something.”

I gave her a dirty unsatisfied look and rolled my eyes.

Mother: “I saw you giving me that look. Am I not allowed to talk now? Is this how your life is?”

I fumed and increased my decibels.

Me: “I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO! WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? IS THERE SOMETHING TO DO? TELL ME!”

Mother got angry now.

Mother: “There is no point in talking to you anymore. Just stay there and do nothing.”

I didn’t understand what she wanted me to do. What was her plan? She is already ashamed of me because I don’t have a job. What will she tell her friends? Mona does not work? OH NO! I don’t even get out of the house till late afternoon so her friends won’t accidentally see me outside in the mall or walking in the neighbourhood and thinking, “OH MY GOD! MONA IS NOT WORKING!!”

Do Arabs have nothing better to do than pin point each other out and ask why why why?

Is it wrong to not work? It used to be or still is this bad thing that an Arabic girl who is 28 and beyond expiry date to not be married, but not having a JOB? Now that’s putting shame on the entire family!

That’s the modern way of Arab thinking.

And people even dare ask me how I have a Computer Science degree, have 6 years of experience, and can’t get a job with all THAT. My only answer, hmm, “I am a girl. I look young. I don’t look like a nerd, in fact, I look like someone who should be working in something more girly like HR, or banks.” So do you think anyone would take me seriously with the way I look in this money hungry world that is going through a recession? Even if I show them all the work I have done in the past, sugar coat everything I say, try to sell my self, and over exaggerate how awesome I am, no one will care! I am not joking here people, I am considering really hard many many options, but they will cost me money. I am thinking of going back to University and doing another degree. But I don’t know if I want to be 31/32 years old when I graduate from the second one. That’s a big commitment. Also, I don’t think I have the will power to go back and listen to boring lectures from professors who are there because they are forced to, so they can continue getting grant money to do their research and publish papers.

I publish EVERY DAY! I should have earned my PhD in ranting by now!

Moreover, I asked a bunch of Arabic girls a couple of days ago on Facebook and Twitter, what is their biggest problem being an Arab? The most common theme was, “I AM AN ARAB GIRL! ARAB SOCIETY, ESPECIALLY MY PARENTS, NEED TO LEAVE ME ALONE TO DO WHAT I WANT! I am NOT doing anything WRONG! What’s wrong if I MAKE MY OWN CHOICES and LIVE MY OWN LIFE! WHY they DON’T have any TRUST in me?”

They have no trust in us, and treat us like we are a shame on the family if we are not married or working or whatever shit they come up with to “raise their heads high” with us. I think and I am 100% sure that they treat us this way because they doubt THEIR WAYS of raising their OWN kids!

Arabs say, “now how polite and nice that girl is, she was raised well.”

Arabs say, “oh, she is not married. She is not working. She is not … whatever , then it must be her parent’s fault and HERS too, because she was raised this way.”

Do you see now my problem? I know many people have been messaging me and emailing me, and I apologize for not responding, but what do you want me to say more than what I say on this blog? BEING AN ARAB SOMETIMES SUCKS!

And my mother came back again while I was writing this post and saying, why don’t you go outside  and walk for a bit? I told her, I DO EVERY DAY! FOR OVER AN HOUR!” She said, “you are only walking in a mall. That’s not walking.”

??? Can someone shoot me now and end my misery. Please?

Angry, Ranting as usual!, They said what?, Whatever!

I think I am suffering from some type of online paranoia. I feel there are certain people watching me, and I don’t know why. Lately, I have been getting more and more local people viewing my blog. It’s kind of freaky. I am a bit worried, why oh why do they find this blog interesting? Hmm.

Should I watch out from stalkers soon? I have gotten a lot of people at the mall and out of no where talking to me saying they have seen me before and think I am this other person, or they think they saw me a while ago, but they wouldn’t tell me where.

Would you follow a blog of someone in your local city and try to find them or know who they are, and want to know them personally?

Were you ever paranoid your self from your blog, that it got to the point that you closed it down?

Blah Blah, Random Thoughts, Whatever!

Sister: I hate being an Arab. OMG!

Me: Why? Do you know much about Arabs? I think your problem is that you are born in these lands and lived here all your life.

Sister: Arabs here have no personality. They are either white washed or think they are black gangstas.

Me: I see where your problem is. They don’t have an identity and you have no idea what an Arab is.

Sister: No, that’s why I don’t like them.

Me: But you are one.

Sister: I only like us, like this family. No one else.

Me: Aren’t you racist?

Sister: So, that’s why no one likes Arabs!

Me: Well, it is more than that. A lot of people around the world don’t like Arabs.

Sister: I know, don’t tell me all that crap about Bin Laden and stuff. He is made up and does not exist anyways. It’s all a lie and ruined our image.

Me: I think Bin Laden is Bush’s best friend.

Sister: I hope Bush dies! I can’t believe he was my president. (My sister is American, born in USA.)

Me: Bush will die one day, in the hands of GOD almighty! AMEN!

Sister: AMEN! Do you think Barak Obama is doing a good job?

Me: How would I know? I don’t keep up with American politics. I am Canadian.

Sister: I know you are lazy, but still suffer from ADHD. STAND STILL WHEN I TALK TO YOU! (We were in the kitchen.)

Me: You should see me on a chair. I keep fidgeting non stop.

Sister: You also have a very noticeable lisp!

Me: So? I am sorry I cannot pronounce S and CH! LEAVE ME ALONE!

My sister is mean!

Culture, Random Thoughts, They said what?, Whatever!

I was at the mall today, and it was really hot outside. I saw two very noticeable groups of females.

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1. Big ladies, 300+ pounds, wearing really tight pants that you can see the lines of the stretchmarks on their thighs or tight Capris, and very low tight revealing tank tops.
2. Older ladies, 50+ years old as it seemed, wearing summer dresses that revealed way too much. Especially on the side where you can see the line of sagging breasts.

I don’t want to be mean. I don’t honestly care about people’s bodies or their lifestyle choice or age, but seriously, cover up to a point that you are not hot, and the world does not make fun of you on a blog. Like what I am doing now and showing to the world how an evil critical bitch I am. There are some things that some of us don’t want to see. If you are too hot, then I believe that wearing more loose fit clothing in the summer is a lot better, because there is less fabric touching the skin. When you walk, the fabric is more lose and more air touches your skin. However, what do I know. I used to get disgusted when I saw girls in University wearing low cut jeans and revealing the colour of their G-strings. Now this . . .

Oh, I am also one of those people that really hate sweat pants that have wordings on the butt. Just so people can see their asses! How lame is that?

Ahhh.. some people seriously need to go on the show, What Not to Wear. Let Stacey and Clinton deal with them.

I am not that much into fashion, or care really about the hottest craziest styles out there for the season, but I know what works and what does not. I say there are many many women out there that are fashion victims, and need a few lessons.

Blah!! My eyes!!

Blah Blah, Ranting as usual!, Whatever!

Warning: this is intended to be a sarcastically humorous post, but it back fired when I decided that revenge is very sweet.. oh so sweet.. like pure chocolate fudge.. hmmm!

A 102, 54, 89, 78, 54, 76 little annoying spam emails that I received this afternoon within a 4 or 5 hour time span. You can say that I should thank the almighty Lord that Gmail got a spam filter. However, I have noticed that the numbers have been drastically increasing, and a lot of those are not being caught by the spam filter, and are very dirty and horny. Don’t those spammers feel a bit ashamed to write out an email to enhance their you know, heart rate? This is my personal Gmail account people!! I am a little, how can I sugar coat this, TICKED OFF! The only way that I would get that much spam within a 4 or 5 hour time spam is if my email is publicly displayed online. With the entire @gmail.com and a href=mailto: link in big fat bolded letters on a site that gets a lot of unnecessary junk.

I have displayed my entire Gmail for my blog on here, but no actual mailto hyperlink, which many of you can easily guess or know. However, I don’t even get that much spam at all on it. Maybe 10 – 15 a day, that’s it. Well, that is not including the spam I get from visitors who ask me weird ass questions, like 5 minutes ago, I received an email that said, “Sarching for true love.” I read it and I was gonna reply with something nasty, but how nasty can I get today? I don’t want to take out my inner anger on this poor fellow. He couldn’t spell searching, and he thinks he can find true love by emailing a blogger girl that goes by the name Rebellious Arab Girl. How absurd!!

Back to my ranting and trying to solve this exponentially increasing amount of spam on my personal Gmail account. One thing I learned while studying Computer Science in University, that investigative technical thinking or searching for the easy ass solution, is so DAMN FUN! So, I decided that maybe I should do the simple thing first, and see who they are addressing the emails to, because I have 3 or 4 other email accounts that I forward to that private Gmail address. Surprisingly, many of the spam emails were directly sent to my Gmail account, and not to any forwarded emails. And no, I don’t use my private emails to sign up on stupid sites or anything. I know where I use it, and what emails I am getting from human beings!

So, I thought and thought some more. I tried to use any left over technically related thought I had regarding emails and came back with another simple solution. Why the hell can’t I just search for my email address using Google? So I Googled my entire Gmail account, and to my utter horror, I found it! I found it publicly displayed in the one place that it should not be! It was in my old work profile! How the hell was my private Gmail address displayed on my public ex-work profile? Why wasn’t my work email on there like it was? Before I left, I used the .forward file in my Unix profile account on the server to make sure that any email to my work address is forwarded to my private … Gmail account! SHIT!

It’s a private .forward file that I used to FORWARD any emails, if I got any from some person looking for me at work and didn’t know that I left that place. So, it would get forwarded to my private Gmail account, so I would know.

Ummm, why the hell did I leave that place? Why did I quit my job back in August.. Ahhh.. because they hired an idiot to pretend he was my boss and order me around. I wish he even did order me around, then I would have given him an ounce of respect as a manager. Yet, I ranted enough in the past about how much he didn’t care and is just there to collect a pay cheque, and pretend he knows a few technical terms so he can keep his job.

HOWEVER!!!!! I am not nice. So I went into his work email account to just see if the place was still in operation, and yes it was, and yes, he didn’t change his password till now (been over a year), and I don’t feel guilty at all that I read his emails. So I tried to see what the problem was and why was I getting that much junk. He was getting a lot of junk emails as well, but were unread. It’s like his email box was unread for a while. So I am guessing he is checking his emails through SMTP and keeping them on the server as unread. So, I kept going back and back to try to see when all this started.

Ahh, I then found it. He decided that with whatever money left over, he would make a new separate mail server and web server for the company. Ah.. yeah.. he is stupid. The company is broke, and he wasted his time creating a badly functioning server instead of helping find a way for a powerful company with a great concept to the Canadian public to stay operational. What’s funny, he was getting emails from his co-workers saying they are getting too many spam emails, unlike before when an actual mail filter was installed on the mail server. Like what many System Admins would do you know. . . Just a normal procedure, you know for people who do System Administrative work, you know. It’s like the first thing you would learn in Computer Science. Security! Filtering! It’s like being responsible for lives people! It’s like System Admin for Idiots. They added the idiot part because there are idiots out there! Don’t be surprised, and they are the ones that have jobs.

I don’t have a job, so I am not an idiot.

So, because he was switching over accounts and acting like he gave a shit, he decided to go into my Unix profile page, and instead of just deleting my entire profile and sparing me that much spam after almost nine months of separation from the work place, he decided to go into my hidden .forward file and copy my private Gmail account, and change my email address on my old work profile that is publicly displayed for the world to see. Instead of it being a professional site and keeping professional looking emails on the site, for credibility sake, he did that. Why was it a problem to just copy over my existing empty profile with a .forward file? The server was not hosting 1000’s of people that it couldn’t handle it. Since the server he newly created is the most unsecured thing on earth, and spammers and hackers love to see such servers, the amount of spam that is being sent to emails through this company’s site has been increased 10 million and a half times. Spammer says “Ohh.. they are displaying entire email addresses with href:mailto links. And look, they are even using free public email addresses on there.” SPAM THEM SPAM THEM the spammer say!! The site is not going anywhere, even if the company has no money, someone will keep it up just so the name is still there online.

So how pissed am I? What should I do?

I decided to be democratic with the masses. I have many many many possible solutions to this problem of receiving tasteless spam, but you my readers, my royal readers from all over the world, that helped my blog traffic be a 100 times better than my old work place’s national company ugly site, that I had nothing to do with artistically, should get a voice in the matter and answer the following poll!

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Yeah.. I need to get something to drink to calm me down. Umm, coffee!!

Updated: I am picturing how it would feel like if I hit the return button after writing the Unix command: rm * -R. Just the thought people is beyond amazing!

Blah Blah, Confused, Funny, Idiots, Ranting as usual!, Thank you, Whatever!