I am fully awake.. I woke up at 8:45. According to my mom I woke up late. Go figure. Anyways, hmm. I am not sure what to say. I watched little TV this morning and had me a cup of tea. I need caffine but not this early in the morning. When I go back to work on Monday it will be caffine city! Aah.. Today it is snowing again. yaay.. snow and cold. Feels like winter again. I can’t stand the heat. I think once it goes over 1 degrees celcius, I feel hot. lol I don’t know why. I think because it started snowing a month ago.. Like since the begining of November we had snow storms and cold weather. Oh well. I wish it is winter all year long. Or at least below 10 degrees. I like that. Less then 10.. Snow I am not too crazy about, but I don’t like rain. Makes me so depressed. Anyways, I been getting so many emails lately and I have not replied to anyone. I need to so I won’t look like a snob.. I am not.. I am just lazy! hehe.
It has been such a lazy day. I didn’t do anything productive. I been so bored this week. I can’t believe how boring it is. I think it is the weather. Very gloomy. I don’t know. I can’t wait till this week is over and go back to work. Although work may not seem to be the best place on earth, but I got to do what I got to do. Work and live. Need money for survival in this world. I always wondered how life would be if I lived a 100 years ago. Or 200 years ago. At least chatting or internet would not have existed and I would be writing my memoirs. hehe.. That would be funny. I think I would have had at least an interesting life back then. Unlike now. I think the life we live in, because we have so much of everything that it has become so boring. Nothing interesting at all. No adventure. Nothing. Hmm. Maybe I am exaggerating. I don’t know. All I know is I would like to go to sleep soon cuz I am super tired. I wake up early. I try not to sleep in and not to stay up late, because waking up at 6:30 am to get ready to be at work at 8:00 am will be such a pain. I had so much coffee today. More then Coca Cola. I think I switched the caffine type dosage today. Oh well. I am done for today. I want to sleep. Nighty night to me and to everyone. Inshallah till tomorrow!
I think I been to the mall waay too much this week.. What did I buy today.. Hmm.. in Sears they had bed-in-a-bag deal for 40 bucks. It is goldish colour and so so so nice. I couldn’t say no.. mom said take it now! ..ehm ehm.. can’t say no to mom! lol .. anywho.. I been trying to keep my self busy by not sitting on the computer much. Just trying to not keep waiting for someone to talk to me or waiting for anyone. Just chilling checking my email and browsing the net. I want to watch TV now and I am drinking Arabic coffee. Not turkish. 3araby.. The yellow one with spices and stuff.. it is like a drug.. Now I will feel sleepy.. No wonder Arabs always look drugged up sitting in a dewan or majles. Hehehe..
Thinking of tomorrow..
I have not been happy lately. I am not sure why. I think I keep trying so hard to reach a goal in life. To reach a destination. Like a milestone I am trying to reach. I am not sure why. I don’t know what it is I am looking for. I keep thinking and thinking of so many sad things. About my life. How I turned out to be. After all these years and I feel like I have not accomplished much. I have not reached the point I want to be at. It was not planned this way. I didn’t have a plan. I just had an idea and hope. But I didn’t think very well. I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like I try so hard and not accomplishing anything of any importance to my life. I want to do something. I was thinking today of my new year’s resolution. For some reason I feel like the next year may be a turn point in my life. I feel like I will be loosing everything that is dear to me. Everything will just go away and I will continue my life alone and wishing that I should have made a different turn in my life a few years ago. I honestly didn’t want to be where I am today. Stuck at the end of the string not knowing when I will be let loose or just fall. I don’t know at all what to do anymore. I dont know. I think I just need to sleep and wish this week will be over soon and go to work and just not think anymore. I don’t want to think or do anything anymore. I’m just tired and sad and lonely.
Aah.. since when does it rain in December? End of december… It was snowing a month ago.. Actually for the past month.. now it is raining because it is 1 or 2 degrees celcius.. I can see the green grass again.. psssh paaaaaaaaaash.. who wants to see green now.. el denya kanet ma7laha beeeda!! mnawraaa..
Anyways.. I am so bored at home. I wish I was at work. Boring sitting at home. Watched enough TV and musalsalat for one day! eff.. wait.. there is another mosalsal in 20 min.. hehehe.. Anywho.. i am trying today not to sit on the computer much.. just checking email.. checking my websites and filtering people’s comments in my other sites.. ( I have many).. lol ya yah.. hmm…
I will post again later when I am more awake. I just ate lunch.. so I am back to the moody sleepy feeling.. hehe. I met some interesting people from that arablounge site today.. I like talking to other people.. I know there are so many interesting and educated people out there that are worth talking to. London is becoming a boring city with people who only care about themselves and money. I hate money. I want to quit work so I can be lazy bum watching TV all day… I will just be an ebay junkie.. buy and sell stuff and live off that.. I just need enough to pay off my student loans.. So technically.. for me to survive and pay my bills.. I need just 600 bucks a month. That’s it! Simple life.. So should I start the paypal donation button of please please donate for my cause. I want to buy shoes!! looooool